Orkut’s 9 commandments!

1. You’re Profile photo should be at least from a period of your life in which you could pee on your own!
I know you’ve missed the attention you’ve been receiving when you were three, but believe me, no one fantasize a 35 years old man, in dipper!

2. You’re not here only for Activity partners and business networking if you’re profile photo is more like a Victoria Secret’s add!
Either change your photo or admit that you like attentions from people you don’t have any business with but you don’t mind to be their partner in some activities!

3. Girls, just because our country situated in the continent of Asia, you’re not qualified to call yourself Asian!
For that matter, certain other rules apply.


4. If in your profile photo, you’re in a pink bikini in Cancun, holding a Pina Colada, you can not chose Islam as your religion!
Sorry folks! Islam has some regulations that you’ve already broken a dozen of them in one picture so… get over it!

5. That gorgeous elegant lady with those dreamy eyes is not you, she’s a deceased actress called Audrey Hepburn!
I don’t know how much you hate your actual appearance, but seriously, putting up that beautiful picture there, doesn’t change anything!

6. Dragging your boyfriend into your profile picture is not cute!
There are multitudes of places where you can prove your love to your partner and Orkut’s profile photo is definitively not one of those. Changing your relationship status to committed is the decent, less pretentious way of declaring the same thing!

7. You can call yourself a Very Left liberal, if you can distinguish the difference between your left and right hands!
To be politically Very left is not a symbol of being cool, it’s choosing a life style in which your father should start paying taxes and you can’t go skiing on Monday mornings!

8. Funny and quick-witted are the compliments, OTHER PEOPLE should give to you!
If you are so obsessed to be called those, ask one of your stooges to write a testimonial for you!

9. That dark spot in the horizon could be anything from a palm tree to a lost camel. All cameras these days have a button with which you can zoom in! Next time you want to take a picture for your profile, use it!

Sorry! Since I had to go to the bathroom, I couldn’t wait for God to send the last one. You figure it out yourself.