An Erotic Take on Unemployment - By Mehrad Ahari

1. Introduction

People, in general, like to know about others' erotic lives, and – although many don’t acknowledge – they enjoy erotica. Interestingly enough, researchers at Duke University have proven that this interest of ours is also shared by primates, indicating that there might be an evolutionary basis for our fascination with pornography. (Click here to read about it)

Unfortunately, the knowledge of Macroeconomics – despite its unquestionable importance for every citizen in a democratic society – does not enjoy the same allure. While it is almost a civic duty to understand the fundamental of Macroeconomics, the majority is deeply uninterested to read about it.

Hence - and as a civic duty of mine! - I took it upon myself to combine the latter, with a mild dose of the former to make it palatable for everyone, pretty much like adding a bit of sugar to the medicine.

So, here is the important subject of Unemployment, erotically explained!

2. The Labor market

Imagine a secluded singles’ resort in the Caribbean filled with young men and women, who’re looking forward to have some fun [The Labor market].

First of all, let’s see what The “Labor Force” is: Although the majority of these singles can’t wait to see some action, not everyone is interested in fooling around: Some are committed [retired], some are not in the mood for love [under 16], some are celibate [sick, mentally unstable and etc.] and some are there, merely to enjoy the scenery [full-time students]. Hence the labor force is, simply, the whole population of vacationers, minus those who’re not looking for sex. Therefore, the “unemployment rate” is the percentage of those who’re looking for sex but aren’t having any, over the “labor force”. As simple as that!

Now that we know what the “labor force” is, and we can also calculate the “rate of joblessness”, let’s continue with the story of our little resort…

3. Full Employment

Every night, for a given level of expectation [real wage], a certain percentage of vacationers can get laid.

Moreover, there are certain delightful nights where almost every man who has reasonable expectations, and is looking for a partner can find a suitable one. In the Caribbean, they call a night as such “La Noche de Amor”. In Macroeconomics, they’re simply called “Full Employment”!

During these enchanting nights, theoretically, there should be no room for anyone who doesn't need a room! But in practice, there “is not enough love to go round”, even during “the night of love” and some people will end up with no one to couple with, but their own hands. Those who remain celibate during the night of love are considered to be “Naturally Unshagables” [Natural Unemployment]. Let’s explore why?

4. Frictional and Structural Unemployment

Imagine a lovely bonfire on the beach, very close to the ocean, where young men and women are dancing and singing [Graduates, right out of the school], flirting and cuddling [workers between jobs and so on]. These folks want to mate, and they want it badly. Otherwise, they would have been sleeping in their rooms. However, unlike those who right at that movement are having steaming hot sex [those who’re employed], they aren’t getting any. But they’re on the right path and hopefully, they’ll have some job to do, before the dawn! These people, who’re doing the dance of love, but not making any love, are called “Between loves” or from the perspective of Macroeconomics “Frictionally unemployed” (Isn’t it amusing when the actual term in the Economics is actually sexier?!)

But apart from those, there is a second group of folks who’re willing to copulate but can’t succeed. Here is the story: There’s a not-so-charming, and a bit overweight girl at the bar, who wants to fool around with that geeky guy who’s sipping his beer on the back porch. However, the geeky guy doesn’t want to sleep with her. He’s fancying that hot voluptuous goddess who’s dancing passionately in her short red skirt. Yet, the gorgeous girl has her eyes on that tall handsome man who’s sitting at the corner, not knowing that he’s gay and he’s dreaming about the muscular bartender, who is; by the way, straight!

At the end of the night, this horny bunch [Structurally unemployed] will sleep alone, despite the fact that there were enough willing partners to sleep with. It’s just that what they want and what they can get, don’t match each other [skills that employers are looking for don’t match that of job seekers in that geographical area].

Nonetheless, if the situation continues for few nights, two things might happen: Either the sexual pressure might convince the gorgeous girl to sleep with the geeky guy [Underemployment], or she might give up on the whole idea of getting laid for a while and start reading or scuba diving! In either of those cases, she’s out of the labor market. That is exactly why the existence of this kind of sexually-deprived people [structurally unemployed] bothers the resort manager [the government] the most!

5. Cyclical Unemployment

It would be fantastic if every night was “La Noche de Amor”, but unfortunately, life [Economy] doesn’t work that way. There would be many nights where even handsome vacationers should sleep alone [Recession]!

Let’s imagine a night that has coincided with the final match of the European champions’ league between Bayern Munich and Barcelona (North Americans can alternatively read: “Super Bowl” or “Stanley cup’s final”). There’re still enough beautiful and willing ladies around the resort [supply in abundance] but most of gents prefer to spend their nights in front of a giant flat screen TV, enjoying the intense suspense and their pints of beer. In response, ladies might try their finest seduction techniques [promotion, lowering price and etc], but sometimes, even the fatal attraction of a goddess falls short of the allure of the live sport. Consequently, most of the ladies would give up on that tasteless bunch and would go to their rooms, frustrated [a recession due to demand shock].

The manager of the resort [governments and central banks], however, has many tools in his toolbox to prevent, or shorten the misery. He can organize a topless bikini contest [lowering taxes], offer an open bar [fiscal stimulus], or even extend it till the morning [lowering interest rates], all of which, designed to tempt sports fans to give up on football and get back to bed. Sometimes, those techniques work and a sexual boom follows the erotic bust. Other times, the resort steps into a depression mode!

There is another form of recession and that happens where – this time – ladies stop supplying their femininity. Imagine that a female-empowering-self-help book is going around the resort that encourages women to save themselves for their one true love and refrain from meaningless sex with random strangers [high price of oil and other raw materials for example]. The result would be dozens of bored, eligible men around the pool with very few women to hang out with [Recession due to Supply shock]. The result of this event would be almost the same as the previous one: sharp reduction in the erotic action. Nonetheless, there would be one major difference here: Those few women who either didn’t read the book, or weren’t convinced of the premise, will become extremely popular and in ridiculously high demand [Inflation]. Nonetheless, the resort manager can still try to remedy the situation by supplying more alcohol [reducing the production barrier, corporate tax rates and etc].

There would be cases where both demand and supply diminish. Suppose that a rumor is going on around the resort that some sort of STD epidemic is on the rise [collapse of the financial system for example]. Crab-fearing vacationers; both men and women, would abstain from sexual contacts and their actions would cause the resort to move away from a Pazzollini’s cinematic creation toward something that satisfies the Pope!

Almost every tourism experts [economists] believe that in those situations, the resort manager should; first and foremost, deal with the rumor of STD [save the finical system, even if a massive bail out is necessary] otherwise the resort will never recover.

In all those cases, those who did not make love are called “periodically sex-deprived” [Cyclically unemployed].

6. Conclusion

Now let’s leave the island for a minute and get back to real life. Can you tell me:

• What is the labor market and how we can calculate unemployment rate?
• What are the full employment and the natural rate of unemployment?
• Why some people are still unemployed, even during full employment?
• What are the definition of structural and frictional unemployment?
• What is the cyclical unemployment and how it is different from Natural unemployment?

As you just saw, Macroeconomics is not difficult, and it is much harder for politicians to fool those who know it.

Well, that was my civic duty, fulfilled I suppose!

Coffee Mate!

Coffee drinkers have long used the “coffee whitener / coffee mate” to simulate the effect of milk or cream. But have you ever wondered what’s inside a coffee mate jar?

Yesterday at work, while I was waiting for the electric kettle to bring some water to boil, I got bored and found myself reading the list of the ingredients that together make our coffees white. Here’s the list:

• Glucose Syrup
• Hydrogenated Vegeteble Oil (May contain Coconut, Palm Kernel and/or Soybean Oil)
• Dipostassium Phosphate
• Sodium Aluminum Silicate
• Monoglycerides
• Acetylated Tartaric Acid Esters of Mono – and Dyglycerides
• Artificial Flavours
• Colour
• Sodium Caseinate (a Milk derivative)

Well, I’m neither a doctor nor medically inclined, but if I’d been a coffee drinker, I would have put a carton of milk in the fridge! My guess is that it’s better for you than “Sodium Aluminum Silicate”!

Best Tech Of The Decade: The 14 Greatest Gadgets From 2000-2010

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2010 Pictures of the Year - From LIFE

Made in Dagenham

Made in Dagenham, the latest film from Nigel Cole (Calendar Girls) depicts the heart-warming story of working women in Ford assembly plant in Dagenham who, in 1968, walked out in protest against gender discrimination; a bold move that resulted in “Equal pay Act of 1970” in England.

Made in Dagenham is a well-made, witty, thoughtful and stylish movie that although is not a cinematic masterpiece, it is head and shoulders above much of what you can see these days in theatres. Sally Hawkins (Happy Go Lucky) brilliantly revives the heroine of the story; Rita O’grady, in an Oscar-worthy performance and the rest of the actors are no less impressive, specifically after you get use to their thick cockney accents that make the first twenty minutes of the movie, literally incomprehensible.

I admit that Made in Dagenham is, at times, predictable and it never shies away from using clichés. It is, nonetheless, an inspiring movie that challenges you to think and encourages you to empathize, and even shed a few tears on the side. Meanwhile, the movie keeps a fine line between optimism and realism and it is delightfully cautious, not to over-milk sentimental moments. It is an easily enjoyable movie that provides an utterly refreshing and satisfying experience.

I strongly recommend this movie, particularly to all my friends from Iran, where women have been fighting bravely, not for the right to equal pay, but sadly, for the right of equal existence! Made in Dagenham reassures you that if your cause is so obviously right, even an ostensibly powerless but highly motivated group can accomplish the seemingly impossible!

And for my female friends in North America: If this wonderful film, sells one cent short of that hideous “Sex and the city 2”, you should all be thoroughly ashamed of yourselves! So rush to the theatres and support the movie that empowers women, through encouraging them to demand their rightful place in the society, and not through excessive shoe shopping!

When Zombies Win - By Paul Krugman

"Free-market fundamentalists have been wrong about everything — yet they now dominate the political scene more thoroughly than ever."...

"A policy under which government employment actually fell, under which government spending on goods and services grew more slowly than during the Bush years, hardly constitutes a test of Keynesian economics."...

Read the full article

Touching Bases!

Don’t you think that we use way too many sports lingo in our daily conversations, specifically in our business meetings?!

Just think about it: The ball is in your court, don’t drop the ball, get the ball rolling, right off the bat, he doesn’t play ball with us, ballpark figure, keep your eyes on the ball, hands down, go to distance, and the list goes on and on and on, like a boring game of baseball from which most of these expressions have derived!!!

Just to be clear, unless you’re extremely hot, I won’t touch your base, neither you can touch mine! So stop suggesting it! :)

Fairness and Tax Policy

Recently, an economist friend of mine drew my attention to a tremendously interesting intellectual exchange of ideas, between Gregory Mankiw from Harvard and Jonathan Weinstein from Kellogg, on the subject of progressive taxation and income distribution: “Are the wealthiest citizens paying their fair share of taxes?”

Read "Spreading the wealth around" by Gregory Mankiw

Read "Fairness and Tax Policy" by Jonathan Weinstein

Amidst the heated debate over the extension of Bush’s tax cut for the wealthiest Americans, reading these two articles is HIGHLY recommended.

At the end; and in addition to the questions that were raised by Weinstein, I would like to raise a question of my own: Is it possible to argue – even when market imperfections are taken into consideration - that citizens’ contributions to the society are always proportionally rewarded? For one instance, in our media-heavy culture, anything that can entertain – and thus, attract viewership- can be heavily monetized through advertisements. Hence, it gives a disproportionate piece of the pie to those who can entertain - the funny host of a popular TV show, for example - compared to those whose invaluable contributions are much less entertaining, such as a world-class researcher who expands the frontiers of the human knowledge.

Block Those Metaphors - By Paul Krugman

"bad metaphors make for bad policy. The idea that the economic engine is going to catch or the patient rise from his sickbed any day now encourages policy makers to settle for sloppy, short-term measures when the economy really needs well-designed, sustained support." Read the article

Endgame in Sudan by George Clooney

"We were late to Rwanda. We were late to Congo. We were late to Darfur. We can't afford to be late again. This is our chance to actually stop a war before it starts." Read the article

George Carlin on the Sanctity of Life

"Life is sacred?! Who said so?! God?! Hey if you read history you realize that God is one of the leading causes of death. Has been for thousands of years. Hindus, Muslims, Jews, Christians, all taking turns killing each other cause God told them it was a good idea! The sword of God, the blood of the lamb, vengeance is mine..millions of dead mother fuckers all because they gave a wrong answer to the God question!" George Carlin, Back in Town

Sex by surprise!

Yesterday, the founder of Wikileaks, Julian Assange, was arrested in London. He will be extradited to Sweden to be tried there. However, as the prosecutor of the case insisted, charges are totally unrelated to the fact that this guy has frequently and repeatedly embarrassed many of the world’s leaders and has been a permanent threat to their secretive machines. Instead, he was accused of rape (in fact, the technical term is "Sex by Surprise!!!"). As if the world’s most wanted anarchist; who happens to be a good-looking guy, needs force to get laid in SWEEDEN - among all places - for crying out loud!!!!

Another smooth move came from Assange’s bank in Switzerland. They froze his account due to a technical glitch: he did not have an address in that country! So I guess it was OK for Nazi leaders to live in Guatemala and have their bank accounts in Switzerland, but not for this guy, huh?!!

Well done folks, but you’re fooling no one!

Let’s see what this “crime of the century” was: During a slumber party, bunch of teenagers who were gossiping about some other teenagers, suddenly realized that they’ve forgotten to turn off their webcam! Now that the whole high school knows about it, their small brains can’t come up with a better idea than breaking the webcam!

That’s it! That’s the story! Only here, that webcam is Julian Assange, and those gossipy teenagers are – regretfully - folks who lead our world!!!

In fairness, they have a lot to be embarrassed about: They’re sending men and women to be killed for wars in which they don’t believe. They’re transferring billions of dollars to governments that are knee deep in corruption and their closest allies in the Middle-east are; and always have been, supporting their biggest enemy, Talibans!

But relax people! Sadly, none of this information is news to us! We already knew that you were bunch of lying hypocrites! We didn’t elect you for your honesty (at least, those among you who’ve been elected, for Christ sake!). We elected you because we didn’t have any better option, and we elected you to create some freaking jobs, balance the budget, and get the world’s economy out of this slump!

So shut the hell up, stop whining, get back to your jobs and leave this poor guy ALONE!

And for future references, if you can’t build more transparency, at least STOP acting like teenagers!

Julian Assange: Why the world needs WikiLeaks

100 Notable Books of 2010

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The Spanish Prisoner by Paul Krugman

"The bad news about America is that a powerful political faction is trying to shackle the Federal Reserve, in effect removing the one big advantage we have over the suffering Spaniards. Republican attacks on the Fed — demands that it stop trying to promote economic recovery and focus instead on keeping the dollar strong and fighting the imaginary risks of inflation — amount to a demand that we voluntarily put ourselves in the Spanish prison." Read the full article

I do not entirely agree with him on the Spain's debt issue. Although, by joining the Euro zone they have lost their ability to devalue their currency, but at least their debt remains in Euro (the luxury from which most of east Asian countries were deprived, during 1997 crisis). However, he is right on the money in condemning the latest assaults on the Fed's independence (though despite what he says, the attacks are not coming only from conservatives, but from the liberals as well).

Dear Congressmen, confine the democracy to that dysfunctional Congress and don't mess with the Fed's precious Independence, please!

WikiLeaks: U.S.-Iran Relations "Now What" Moment?

"Moreover, as the leaked cables show, the highest levels of the Obama administration never believed that diplomacy could succeed. While this does not cheapen Obama's Nowruz message and other groundbreaking facets of his initial outreach, it does raise three important questions: How can U.S. policymakers give maximum effort to make diplomacy succeed if they admittedly never believed their efforts could work? Why was Iran expected to accept negotiation terms that relinquished its greatest strategic asset (1200 kg of LEU) without receiving a strategic asset of equal value in return? And what are the chances that Iran will take diplomacy seriously now that it knows the U.S. never really did? The Obama administration presented a solid vision, but never truly pursued it. " Read the article

India's Ambani hosts party for 'world's priciest home'

The world's most expensive dwelling...Read the article

Eating the Irish by Paul Krugman

"Then the bubble burst, and those banks faced huge losses. You might have expected those who lent money to the banks to share in the losses. After all, they were consenting adults, and if they failed to understand the risks they were taking that was nobody’s fault but their own. But, no, the Irish government stepped in to guarantee the banks’ debt, turning private losses into public obligations."

"Before the bank bust, Ireland had little public debt. But with taxpayers suddenly on the hook for gigantic bank losses, even as revenues plunged, the nation’s creditworthiness was put in doubt. So Ireland tried to reassure the markets with a harsh program of spending cuts."...

"But at this point Iceland seems, if anything, to be doing better than its near-namesake. Its economic slump was no deeper than Ireland’s, its job losses were less severe and it seems better positioned for recovery. In fact, investors now appear to consider Iceland’s debt safer than Ireland’s. How is that possible?

Part of the answer is that Iceland let foreign lenders to its runaway banks pay the price of their poor judgment, rather than putting its own taxpayers on the line to guarantee bad private debts. As the International Monetary Fund notes — approvingly! — “private sector bankruptcies have led to a marked decline in external debt.” Meanwhile, Iceland helped avoid a financial panic in part by imposing temporary capital controls — that is, by limiting the ability of residents to pull funds out of the country."

Read the article

Cost of long-gun registry a fraction of what Tories claim, report shows

I am not against saving some money here and there, but guys, there's a limit to bullshitting the public! There is a slight difference between $1.5 million and $2 Billion!!!!

"An independent cost-benefit analysis of Conservative legislation to kill the federal long-gun registry has found the public savings could amount to just over $1.5-million annually"...

"This September’s very close vote is the furthest we have come to dismantling the $2-billion wasteful and ineffective long-gun registry,” said Christopher McCluskey, a spokesman for Public Safety Minister Vic Toews. “We will continue to work to scrap it.”

Read the article

A Spanish Bailout Would Test Europe’s Strained Finances

"But any bailout of Spain — with an economy twice the size of the other three combined — could severely stress the ability of Europe’s stronger countries to help the financially weaker ones, and spell deep trouble for the euro, Europe’s common currency". Read the full article

U.K. to measure happiness alongside GDP

I'm no fan of Tories, but I'm beginning to like this guy! Shame on me! :))

Read the article

A Hedge Fund Republic? By NICHOLAS D. KRISTOF

"Oops! That’s already us. The top 1 percent of Americans owns 34 percent of America’s private net worth, according to figures compiled by the Economic Policy Institute in Washington. The bottom 90 percent owns just 29 percent." Read the full article

Scientists Claim Breakthrough In Antimatter Hunt

"Scientists may have been able to capture elusive atoms of antimatter"..."But in a report published online by the journal Nature, the scientists said they'd been able to trap individual atoms and keep them around for a bit more than one-tenth of a second. To a particle physicist, that's a pretty long time." Read the full article

The Man Who Shattered Our Economy

The story of Citibank's CEO...It is a disgrace that some people are spending time in jail for shoplifting, but these bandits are enjoying their lives! Read the full story

15 Food & Cooking Myths, Busted

"MYTH: Raw foods are more nourishing than cooked foods because their enzymes are still alive."

"MYTH: Brining meats before cooking makes them juicier and more tender."

"MYTH: Searing meat at a high temperature seals in its juices."

I have heard these so many times that I have hard time believing they aren't true...Read the full article

Top 10 Must-Have Apps for the iPhone, and Some Runners-Up

Google, Soundhound, Hipstamatic, Evernotes and many more...Read the full article in NYTimes

The Hijacked Commission by Paul Krugman

I do not agree with him entirely but he does raise some valid points...

"that “bipartisanship” would mean what it so often does in Washington: a compromise between the center-right and the hard-right."..."what the co-chairmen are proposing is a mixture of tax cuts and tax increases — tax cuts for the wealthy, tax increases for the middle class"...

"They want the age at which Social Security becomes available to rise along with average life expectancy. Is that reasonable? The answer is no, for a number of reasons — including the point that working until you’re 69, which may sound doable for people with desk jobs, is a lot harder for the many Americans who still do physical labor. But beyond that, the proposal seemingly ignores a crucial point: while average life expectancy is indeed rising, it’s doing so mainly for high earners, precisely the people who need Social Security least. Life expectancy in the bottom half of the income distribution has barely inched up over the past three decades. So the Bowles-Simpson proposal is basically saying that janitors should be forced to work longer because these days corporate lawyers live to a ripe old age."...

Read the full article in NYTimes

Super Efficient Crew Builds 15-Story Chinese Hotel In Just SIX DAYS

Un-freaking-believable!!! Watch this amazing video

Jon Stewart and Rachel Maddow

Two people that I deeply respect are having an impeccably eloquent and intelligent debate about news media...not to be missed:

Part one

Part two

Part three

Part four

Dundee V&A design winner chosen

There are few things in the world that make me as excited as good architecture...Read the article in BBC

Implanted chip 'allows blind people to detect objects'

"A man with an inherited form of blindness has been able to identify letters and a clock face using a pioneering implant, researchers say." Read the full article in BBC

Virus breakthrough raises hope over ending common cold

"Scientists say they have made a landmark discovery which could pave the way for new drugs to beat illnesses like the common cold." Read the article in BBC

Liberals refuse to give Tories ‘free pass’ on jet purchase

"Michael Ignatieff’s Liberals are not letting up on their fight against the $16-billion purchase of 65 next-generation stealth fighter jets, arguing Stephen Harper’s Tories want a “free pass on the largest sole-source contract in Canadian history.”... Read the article in Globe and Mail

First of all; and amidst all the cuts in public services to balance the budget, I am glad that we are spending billions of dollars to modernize our airforce. You know, that was the main reason we couldn't suceed in Afghanistan: Compared to some bearded fanatics armed with Kalashnikov, our airforce was not modern enough!!!

" the Tory memo says. “When the economic recovery is still fragile, the last thing the aerospace workers and their families need is Michael Ignatieff threatening their jobs.”

Interesting, so my dear right-wing economists, Keynes' idea- that the governments can create jobs during recessions through spending - works perfectly well when it comes to the military, it only fails when we try to build more useful things than killing machines, huh?!!

Finally, I hate the gutlessness of Liberals. The problem with this deal is not the fairness of its price, it is its contradiction with the ruling party's slogan of fiscal responsibility. When you don't dare to make such a simple case, you wonder why you can't get elected?!!!

David Broder: War With Iran Will Save Economy, Obama Presidency!!!

Could someone please stop this idiot, David Broder?!

"Here is where Obama is likely to prevail. With strong Republican support in Congress for challenging Iran's ambition to become a nuclear power, he can spend much of 2011 and 2012 orchestrating a showdown with the mullahs. This will help him politically because the opposition party will be urging him on. And as tensions rise and we accelerate preparations for war, the economy will improve." Read the full article

Mugged by the Moralizers by Paul Krugman

"So the moralizers are winning. More and more voters, both here and in Europe, are convinced that what we need is not more stimulus but more punishment. Governments must tighten their belts; debtors must pay what they owe. The irony is that in their determination to punish the undeserving, voters are punishing themselves: by rejecting fiscal stimulus and debt relief, they’re perpetuating high unemployment. They are, in effect, cutting off their own jobs to spite their neighbors." Read the full article

Federal Reserve's, Bernanke's credibility on line with new move to boost economy

"The Federal Reserve is preparing to put its credibility on the line as it rarely has before by taking dramatic new action this week to try jolting the economy out of its slumber." Read the full article

The Economy Is Growing -- But Jobs Aren't Following

"A growth rate of 5 percent or higher is needed to put a major dent in the nation's 9.6 percent unemployment rate."...Read the full article

Tariq Aziz is a man who knows too much | Mark Seddon | guardian.co.uk

Read the full article

GOP Candidate Ken Buck: 'I Disagree Strongly With The Concept Of Separation Of Church And State'

Welcome to Christian republic of America! Read the full article

Newsweek Poll: Obama Approval Jumps, Dems More Fired Up

"The poll finds that 48 percent of registered voters would be more likely to vote for Democrats, compared with 42 percent who lean Republican" Read the full article in Newsweek

Paul the World Cup octopus dies in his tank in Germany

Personally, I was not a big fan of the late Octopus, but rest in peace Paul.

Falling Into the Chasm (By Paul Kruman)

Another interesting article from Krugman. One of the few remaining outspoken economists who still use reason! Read the full Article

Toll rises as French strikes escalate

"France's massive strikes are costing the national economy up to €400-million ($557-million) each day, the French finance minister said Monday" Read the Full Article

Even for a pro-union, pro-welfare person such as myself, this spectacle was a disgrace! Increasing the minimum retirement age from 60 to 62, did not deserve such a fuss, whatsoever! It was an inevitable reform, reflecting the fact the we live much longer (on average) than previous generations. This upheaval is no less than blackmailing the French society...

One Minute Fly

Carney: Get ready for the rebound

"For households, that means remembering that today’s interest rates are far from normal and continually assessing whether their debt loads will be manageable once borrowing costs rise. For businesses, it means investing aggressively in machinery and equipment that will help them become more productive and competitive, to mitigate the fact weaker demand around the world and a strong currency could impede Canadian exports for years." Read the full article

Hypocrites in the world, unite! unite!

It was written in the Globe and Mail on Wednesday : "Quebec’s Orthodox Jewish community appeared for the first time on Wednesday before a National Assembly committee, taking up an unexpected cause – fighting a bill that would ban the wearing of the Muslim niqab when receiving government services." Read the full article

Not surprisingly, the two top contenders in the category of "the most passionate collective misogyny", are now supporting each other's causes!

I do believe in freedom of choice and I do not support any law that attempts to force people to wear (or not to wear) certain type of clothings (I postpone the real argument against the niqab for another occasion). However, niqab, which covers not only the face of the woman behind it, but her identity as well, is an exception. If someone is benefiting from a government service (which has been paid for by all citizens), the provider of that service has to be able to identify the one who is receiving the service. It is that simple.

Moreover, do these groups - who are accusing the government of infringing their liberty - really believe in people's right to chose their own clothings?!!

I would simply give these hypocrites the right to wear the niqab, if they publicly announce that they, too, respect the right of every women, anywhere around the world, to wear what they want, where they want!

The unusual support of Muslim hardliners by their Jewish counterparts should serve as a reminder to moderate Muslims and Jews that they are much closer to each other, than they are to the extremist factions of their own religions.

The bucket of stupidity is bottomless!

In the past couple of days, the world witnessed the newly-elected prime minister of England, David Cameron and his chancellor of exchequer, George Osborne, proposing a package of drastic budget cuts that will affect almost every government-provided service in England from health and environment to BBC's international bureau.

While it is tough to argue against the necessity of balancing a budget deficit as large as 11% of the GDP, it is perfectly legitimate to question the timing of this austerity package. After all, you don’t need to be an expert in Microeconomics to realize that cutting about half a million jobs, just when the economy is barley moving out a devastating recession, is not a wise idea!

Read the following article from Paul Krugman in NYTimes. I quoted below, some of his facts and arguments:

"the sudden consensus among Very Serious People that everyone must balance budgets now now now wasn’t based on any kind of careful analysis. It was more like a fad, something everyone professed to believe because that was what the in-crowd was saying."..."No widespread fad ever passes, however, without leaving some fashion victims in its wake. In this case, the victims are the people of Britain, who have the misfortune to be ruled by a government that took office at the height of the austerity fad and won’t admit that it was wrong."..."Over-reliance on the financial industry largely explains why Britain, which came into the crisis with relatively low public debt, has seen its budget deficit soar to 11 percent of G.D.P. — slightly worse than the U.S. deficit. And there’s no question that Britain will eventually need to balance its books with spending cuts and tax increases. The operative word here should, however, be “eventually.” Fiscal austerity will depress the economy further unless it can be offset by a fall in interest rates. Right now, interest rates in Britain, as in America, are already very low, with little room to fall further. The sensible thing, then, is to devise a plan for putting the nation’s fiscal house in order, while waiting until a solid economic recovery is under way before wielding the ax."..."The British government’s plan is bold, say the pundits — and so it is. But it boldly goes in exactly the wrong direction. It would cut government employment by 490,000 workers — the equivalent of almost three million layoffs in the United States — at a time when the private sector is in no position to provide alternative employment. It would slash spending at a time when private demand isn’t at all ready to take up the slack."..."What happens now? Maybe Britain will get lucky, and something will come along to rescue the economy. But the best guess is that Britain in 2011 will look like Britain in 1931, or the United States in 1937, or Japan in 1997. That is, premature fiscal austerity will lead to a renewed economic slump. As always, those who refuse to learn from the past are doomed to repeat it."

I personally believe that England’s conservative party is fully aware of the consequences of these foolish actions. They are simply, and deliberately, following the footsteps of their American counterparts, in order to kill the welfare-state by strangulation!

As Bill Maher stated while ago: “Democrats have moved to the right and Republicans have moved to the mental hospital”. Apparently, England’s conservatives are heading the same way. Shame on Nick Clegg and Liberal Democrats for selling all their values for such a cheap price: sharing the seat of power for a brief season!

Otter Pups Swim Lesson

Rare and Foolish (By Paul Krugman)

"China accounts for 97 percent of the world’s supply of rare earths, minerals that play an essential role in many high-technology products, including military equipment." Read the full article

A third way for Quebeckers? New party in the offing

"The legislature was full of rumours Thursday about a new right-of-centre party that would be pro-business and ambivalent on the national question." Read the full article

The Mortgage Morass (By Paul Krugman)

A fantastic article by Paul Krugman

"Now an awful truth is becoming apparent: In many cases, the documentation doesn’t exist. In the frenzy of the bubble, much home lending was undertaken by fly-by-night companies trying to generate as much volume as possible. These loans were sold off to mortgage “trusts,” which, in turn, sliced and diced them into mortgage-backed securities. The trusts were legally required to obtain and hold the mortgage notes that specified the borrowers’ obligations. But it’s now apparent that such niceties were frequently neglected. And this means that many of the foreclosures now taking place are, in fact, illegal." Read the full article

Benoît Mandelbrot, Novel Mathematician, Dies at 85

The father of Fractals, passed away. Read the full article

Income Inequality: Too Big to Ignore (By ROBERT H. FRANK)

"Yet many economists are reluctant to confront rising income inequality directly, saying that whether this trend is good or bad requires a value judgment that is best left to philosophers. But that disclaimer rings hollow. Economics, after all, was founded by moral philosophers, and links between the disciplines remain strong. So economists are well positioned to address this question, and the answer is very clear." Read the full article

A great free online Calculator of almost everything

Background noise affects taste of foods, research shows

"The level of background noise affects both the intensity of flavour and the perceived crunchiness of foods, researchers have found."..." Read the full article

Joan Sutherland, Flawless Soprano, Is Dead at 83

She was one of my favorite singers. I absolutely adore her rendition of Casta Diva in Bellini's Norma. Rest in Peace.

Read the full article

Marijuana, Once Divisive, Brings Some Families Closer

Having a joint with grandpa! Read the full article

Google Invests In Major offshore Wind Power Project

"the project would be capable of delivering 2,000 megawatts of wind energy"...Read the full article

A livable planet right next door

"Astronomers say they have for the first time spotted a planet beyond our own in what is sometimes called the Goldilocks zone for life: Not too hot, not too cold. Juuuust right."...

"The planet circles a star called Gliese 581. It's about 120 trillion miles away, so it would take several generations for a spaceship to get there. It may seem like a long distance, but in the scheme of the vast universe, this planet is "like right in our face, right next door to us," Read the Full Article

Gargling With Salt Water Can Ease Cold Symptoms

From NY Times

"At the end of the study period, the group that regularly gargled had a nearly 40 percent decrease in upper respiratory tract infections compared with the control group, and when they did get sick, “gargling tended to attenuate bronchial symptoms,” the researchers wrote." Read the full article

Basic Religion Test Stumps Many Americans (NY Times)

"Those who scored the highest were atheists and agnostics" :)

It sounds ironic but it's not. You need to read and think considerably, before you can deny God, but following religion can be as easy as....

6 Things Everyone Knows About Women (That Aren't True) [From Huffington Post]

BEST MOVIES OF 2008

Here is the list of the best movies of 2008, according to me!

1. Waltz with Bashir (Ari Folman)
2. Le Voyage du ballon rouge (Hsiao-hsien Hou)
3. Slumdug millionaire (Danny Boyle)
4. WALL-E (Andrew Stanton)
5. Caramel (Nadine Labaki)
6. The Dark Knight (Christopher Nolan)
7. MILK (Gus Van Sant)
8. El Orfanato (Juan Antonio Bayona)
9. Blindness (Fernando Meirelles)
10. Changeling (Clint Eastwood)
11. And when did you last see your father? (Anand Tucker)
12. Burn after reading (Coen Brothers)
13. I served the king of England (Jiri Menzel)
14. Happy Go Lucky (Mike Leigh)
15. Hors de Prix (Pierre Salvadori)
16. In Bruges (Martin McDonagh)
17. Body of lies (Ridley Scott)
18. The Bank Job (Roger Donaldson)
19. Religolous (Larry Charles/Bill Maher)
20. The Duchess (Saul Dibb)

Note 1: Some of the movies in the list have been produced in 2007, but since they have been released in Montreal in 2008, I put them in the list.

Note 2: I still haven’t seen some highly-praised movies of the year such as Revolutionary road, The Wrestler, Entre les murs and Gomorra, because they have not been screened in Montreal yet.

Another take on the so-called scandal

In the past of couple of weeks, the whole democratic primary has been heavily shadowed by Barack Obama’s Pastor, Reverend Wright’s scandal. His angry remarks including the infamous “God damn America” were circulated around, specifically on YouTube, and widely played almost everywhere, from cable news to talks shows. Analysts were asking why Obama did not condemn his pastor. Some were judiciously assessing the damage to his campaign and some others, elevated the story to the level of a Greek tragedy in which Wright was subconsciously sabotaging the life and the career of his pseudo-stepson, Barack!

Amidst this festival of talking points’ repetition, one probable and rather obvious hypothesis, was apparently missed unanimously by political analysts. They failed to notice the possibility of an ingenious scheme by Obama’s campaign to design and/or fuel the whole scandal.

Like most of the conspiracy theories, it might sound crazy at first but think about it! Let’s explore the case like a professional detective by asking “Who benefits the most from the scandal?” or “What would have Obama gained or lost, had he designed the whole drama?”

Barack Obama is a highly educated politician with an almost flawless record. He is a young, handsome, impeccably eloquent and extremely charismatic, natural-born speaker who is supposed to run against an old, boring grandpa-veteran who can hardly put three sentences together, before putting everybody to sleep (let’s face it, today’s McCain is nothing like the liberal maverick he was, a decade ago). Besides, Obama’s views on economy, Iraq’s war and healthcare, to name a few, are broadly shared among Americans while those of his opponent, have been considered the continuation of the Bush’s immensely unpopular policies. Even though the magical talent of democrats in losing winnable elections shouldn’t be overlooked, it is highly unlikely that the smart, resourceful and magnetic Obama would fail to become United States next president unless…is there any way Obama could lose this election?

Well, there was one actually. According to most experts, he has been plagued by a major exposed weakness and that was his Arabic middle name, Hussein, coupled with the fact that his father was a Muslim and that he attended a “Madrasah” while he was living in Indonesia! I understand that it is shameful to even consider a mere nonconformity as a major flaw but setting idealism aside, give all those above-mentioned information to an average American while running the Bin-Laden’s picture on the background and voila, you have made yourself a winning strategy!

Stupid as it sounds; it’s not easy to do well in a presidential election when your fist name was Saddam’s last and your last name rhymes with Bin Laden’s first! (I refer all who consider the judgment of an average American underestimated in the aforementioned analogy, to poor Howard Dean’s high pitch scream and its catastrophic effect on his candidacy!)

In fact, the plan had been already started. Emphasizing on his middle name, showing Obama’s picture in traditional African outfit wearing a turban, has- according to polls- persuaded a good percentage of Americans that he was a Muslim! and to many, Muslim, terrorists, what’s the difference?!!

It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that if he wanted to be the next president, he would have been in desperate need to defuse this eminent threat, as soon as possible.

Back to the scandal, let’s first explore what he gained from the reverend Wright scandal?

At the moment, almost every single American, even remotely interested in politics, knows that Barak Hussein Obama is not a Muslim! They all know that despite his middle name, he is a Christian and not only in name, but he has regularly and consistently attended church, over a period of two decades. They clearly know that he has a personal and spiritual mentor name pastor Jeremiah Wright and that his children have been baptized in a Christian church by this pastor. Mission sort of accomplished, huh? (Bush has ruined this phrase forever, hasn’t he?!)

What else Barak could do to keep it going? Well, he could postpone rebutting his pastor, prolonging the whole upheaval for couple more weeks, proving that he is not quite unhappy with Americans’ brains being engraved with the fact that Obama is a Christian.

The incident helped him to substantially reinforce his weakest side; making any future republican attack from this side, practically hopeless and most importantly, he did it without spending even a dime! It even granted him the opportunity to give a historic lecture on “Race in America” that increased his popularity among young educated Americans, strengthen their robust support. Last but not least, Obama’s refusal to condemn Wright in public, accentuated his image as an honest and different politician and not a regular opportunist! (I’m talking to you Hilary! Remembering your grandfather’s memories of teaching you how to shoot, right before Pennsylvania’s primary was rather disgusting. Though not as despicable as John Kerry’s appearance on TV with a hunting rifle and a goose-hunting hat! talking about hunting down Bin Laden as if he was a migrating bird, for heaven’s sake!!!!)

Finally, let’s analyze “things Barack lost in Wright’s Fire”?

Surprisingly, almost nothing! To begin with, the democratic primary had been practically finished long before the scandal. Weeks before Pennsylvania, it would have been mathematically very improbable for Hillary to be able to fill the delegate gap, even if she had won all the remaining contents.

Besides, Obama’s support base has been mostly consist of either African-American voters (who, no matter what, would vote for the only eligible black candidate in the history of the presidential race), or white educated middle class (who are supposed to be intelligent enough to see through this phony drama).

And in practice, he finished the Pennsylvania much better than the anticipations, won Guam and North Carolina and almost tied in Indiana (the state in which he was projected to be lose badly due to the large population of blue collar workers). Could anybody forecast a better result for him, had the scandal not happened?!

The whole reverend Wright Scandal was either one of the most brilliantly executed PR maneuver in the history of the presidential elections, or Obama is just one of the luckiest men alive! Personally, I won’t go with the latter.

Lazy cat on treadmill

Some really funny cats on treadmill

Have a nice Trip!

An apparently regular scene in Tokyo’s rush hours…

I had read about it before but I couldn’t really believe it.

Kai wants a popsickie

So cute...

Jeanne Cherhal - Voilà

Listen to this song “Voila” by French singer “Jeanne Charhal”. Right at the end, it becomes surprisingly Iranian in tune. It’s quite interesting.

Joe Camel is Back!

Does anybody here remember that law, prohibiting any sort of public advertisement for tobacco, the strict and non-negotiable ban that nearly canceled one of Montreal’s most renowned events, Canadian formula one Grand-Prix?

Open any newspaper this week, from “Mirror” to “Ici”, “Hours” to “Voir”, and you’d be shocked by colorful, full pages ads for cigarettes, almost every other page!

Voila! They are back, stronger than before! Apparently, their powerful lobbies have succeeded to buy politicians while convincing the media, not to make a fuss about the whole issue!

Now, I have to admit that I am not an ardent opponent of cigarette advertisements, per say. To be honest, I would have to go with the natural selection if somebody is unable to resist a colorful picture of a box with an image of a cancerous lunge on it!

I am not even against smoking! If somebody wants to jeopardize his/her health and hence help the world’s overpopulation crisis, I do believe that the person should be left alone to do so, as long as the physical damage is solely confined to the person and the burden on the healthcare system is also being appropriately compensated by taxation on cigarettes.

What I am very much concerned about is, this apparent reversal of the law might be just a little entrée before the main course: abandonment of the prohibition on smoking in public places, the delicious fruit of more than three decades of active campaigning against tobacco companies.

Let’s stay vigilant about the subject while making some noise about it. One of these days, the “no smoking” signs might be expelled from public places, as quietly as the ads got re-invited to the pages of our newspapers.

Mike Huckabee and the glorification of Ten Commandments

Today, as the former priest and the presidential desperately-trying–to-remain hopeful, Mike Huckabee, was addressing late Jerry Farwell’s congregation in Virginia (perhaps one of the most narrow-minded and backward group of people on the planet), he pointed out an interesting issue about the relationship between law, morality and the good old ten commandments and reassured everybody that his stupidity has not been confined solely to denying evolution!

This phenomenal outcome of the American conservatism has clearly declared that all the moral laws we need can be found in Ten Commandments and the rest, is just complications we have created to pass around these eternally sufficient rules.

Since most of the people who repeat the word “commandments” have the faintest idea about what they actually are, let’s review these ancient divine rules that are supposed to keep our path illuminated till the end of time:

1. You shall have no other gods before me.
2. You shall not make wrongful use of the name of your God.
3. Remember the Sabbath and keep it holy.
4. Honor your Father and Mother.
5. You shall not murder.
6. You shall not commit adultery.
7. You shall not steal.
8. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor.
9. You shall not covet your neighbor's house.
10. You shall not covet your neighbor's wife

Voila, these are the famous Ten Commandments.

Now note that based on this blatantly tribal and primitively archaic document, while we’re honoring our parents, not humping our neighbors' wives and not putting "Marduk" before "Jehovah", we are still allowed to do whatever we like to anybody who is not our neighbor! In fact, the horrendous massacring, raping and pillaging of non-Israelites, devotedly executed by the followers of Moses and enthusiastically described in the holy Bible itself (with a touch of sadism), attest to this reality.

Even if Christians intend to expand the meaning of the word “Neighbor” to the whole population of the planet (that I’m sure a good number of them are willing to do so), Ten Commandments still severely deficient of some fundamentals of human rights.

Let’s remember that a misogynist, bigot, slave owner, child abuser who destroys the environment and kills helpless animals for fun, is still firmly within the divinely marked path of Ten Commandments, as long as he is careful enough about the usage of the word God!

So dear Mr. Huckabee, if you really do put “remembering Sabbath” ahead of women and children’s protection laws, you’re not even fit to prepare the shopping list for a Picnic let alone becoming president of the United States and I’m truly sorry that in this day and age, uttering such outrageous nonsense is not inducing the appropriate outrage!

Though I do hope it’s just because that nobody takes you and your followers seriously these days...not anymore.

Panoramic view from the interior of Airbus A380, First class seat.

Bunch of Iranians in exile, who can’t locate their beloved country on a world map!

And somehow, we think we're the brightest people on earth!

Way to go guys...

Don't vote for Hilary!

Snowball is a Rockin' to the Back Street Boys Cockatoo!!

This funny parrot made my day! It is priceless!

Obviously, I was only interested in the artistic aspects of this picture!

Robert Scheer Debates Ralph Nader

A fascinating debate between Robert Scheer, one of the boldest journalists of our time and the famous Ralph Nader.

Scheer, holding a more practical stance, while admiring Nader for the brilliant thinker and social critic that he is, criticizing him for weakening the eventual democratic candidate by making the decision of participating in the presidential election , whereas Nader, defends his decision and argues why it is vital to run as presidential candidate despite the almost non-existent chance to win.

Whenever I’m down and I need a huge and spontaneous boost, there’s one website that cheers me up, every single time. This amazing little website is called “Cute Overload” and in fact, it’s a data base of cute animal’s pictures and videos.

So, if you’re an animal lover, keep the link handy. Believe me, you’ll never regret.

Here is an example:

Oh God…how cute is this?!!!

Robert Scheer’s mature, humane and astute political analysis, is one of the delightful voices of today’s media.

Listen to this week’s “Left, Right and Center” and enjoy the wise man’s marvelous comments and remarks.

Clive James

This is an excerpt from one of the world finest journalists, Clive James's interview with PBS’s Bill Moyer. I extremely recommend his latest book, Cultural Amnesia. It is a fascinating read indeed:

“In Vienna especially, because the universities weren’t fully open, the Jewish intellectuals were forced into the cafés and tended to develop a language which we are still speaking now, which is the language of the normal conversational rhythm about profound things. They took the initiative away from the academy, and in my view, it should be always taken away from the academy. I have a lot of respects for academics but academic language should not drive the conversation. The conversation should be driven from journalism. What we do in journalism is not incidental to culture but basic to it and it was demonstrated by the Jewish intellectuals in Vienna cafés. They learnt to write the article, the feuilleton, which is the whole basis of the modern culture.

I don’t believe that knowledge and understanding and wisdom are the property of a class at all. I believe they’re generally democratic things. It doesn’t mean that everyone will understand but anyone can.

It’s still my mission in life to write in a way that anyone who can read will realize that I’m talking about something. My enemy is the elevated language. When I use the word academic in a pejorative sense I mean that the language that puts a distance between the fact being talked about and any possible comprehension. That’s the enemy.

There’s a connection between writing and talking which I like to maintain, for that very reason. It’s a political stance. My political stance is that learning and humanism should not be shut off from the people. That unless you can present these things in a way that can be understood, you’re losing. The idea that you can retreat to some sort of enclave where only you and your fellow qualify people. Incidentally, this idea was rife in the early twentieth century among right wing intellectuals. T.S Elliot for example and all his friends believed that only a few people were qualified for culture. I don’t believe that. I believe even though it might be a minority, anybody can be qualified.”

McDonald with truffles!

Once, there was an adorable German movie called “Bella Martha”. A simple romantic comedy/drama, which was anything but conventional. After all, when one combines romance, cuisine and good cinematography, it would be really inappropriate for the critical mind to function critically!

Although apart from "Departed" and that TV series "Office", I don’t have any recollection of a good American remake of anything whatsoever (and I’m absolutely certain that a good number of people would even question those only examples I represented), I went to the theatre to watch “No Reservation”; the Hollywood remake of the German movie; with the minimum expectation and mostly to observe the possible socio-cultural gap between these two versions. But man! is it possible to watch this shit without every brain cell of yours would cordially wish to exchange its position with a rectum cell of a dying old man, even with one, badly damaged by hemorrhoid!

Though they even repeated a good portion of the dialogues, it was kind of masochistically amusing to see how seriously you can degrade a movie, just by Hollywoodizing it! Meaning, stripping it away from any profundity, injecting some disgraceful, tasteless humor and sentimental crap and removing almost all the subtleties, nuances and sophistication that the original version was so rich of.

In fact, there’s a command in Photoshop that does exactly what writer and director of this movie have achieved to do and it is called “Flatten Layers!”

Back to the movie, apart from the disgustingly superficial additional scenes and story lines, even those scenes which were supposed to be the exact replicate, were nothing but some hollow, flat and badly-made versions of a thoughtful and delicious masterpiece.

Where one could even cry for Martha quite frequently, I seriously doubt that anyone would feel any sympathy for her generic version, “Kate” (or whatever the hell the untalented goddess, "Catherine Zetha Jones" was pathetically trying to portray). Replace the adorable “Lina” with the annoying, smart-mouth "Zoe" and the charming “Mario” with Mr. so-full-of-himself and voila, you’ll have the tasteless, bland, crime-against-cinema, “No Reservation”.

Just as an amuses-bouche, in the German version, Martha lives in a one bedroom apartment (as any normal single person who’s not a CEO would do) and expectedly, when she is forced to take care of her niece, she offers her room to the little girl and start sleeping on the couch. I really could not understand why a single woman in Manhattan should have an extra room, fully furnished!! Maybe because the rents in downtown New York are so affordable that it is crazy not to have some spare rooms! ha?!

And by the way, an Italian chef with a lively soul who hums Italian songs when he cooks is absolutely adorable. An American who plays loud Pavarotti in a busy kitchen in Manhattan and screams horrendously with it, is not!!! Just two minutes of "Aaron Eckhart" is convincing enough to beg Kate to smash his face with a hot, heavy cast-iron saucepan, at least two thousand times until he shuts the hell up forever!!! And maybe that’s how the director and the adaptive screen writer deserve to be treated as well!

Final word, unless one wants to make the same painful socio-cultural experiment, I seriously recommend avoiding this movie at any cost and instead, I absolutely suggest renting the fantastic original German version. After all, reading subtitles for two hours is better than letting your intellect to be insulted for the same amount of time, isn’t it?

A hilarious “Reservoir Dogs” moment from the hilarious BBC comedy series, “Coupling”