That was disgusting…
In the history of the world cup, only two times the final has got to the penalties and Italy was part of both of them. Do you any wonder?
A team who defended in front of a 10 Men’s France, a team who didn’t have even one opportunity in the second half, doesn’t deserve to win.
A false penalty in 92nd minute, a goal in 118 minute and a win in penalty thanks to the bar… good luck Italy…seriously…good luck.
I’m beginning to believe in the Catholic God…apparently it works…
Sunday, July 09, 2006
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
The loneliest man in the world
Germany lost…at least Italy deserved to win and it lessens the pain….
I was in Brussels, with Ali, Leili and Marjan…Ali and Leili both die hard Italian fans and Marjan, not a real fan but enough anti-German to cheer for Italy, we were in an Italian bar with at least 100 Italians and I'd never felt lonelier in my entire life!
I have to say though, just watching those Italians, swearing and waving their hands was a huge stress reliever to be honest and watching Ali who was accompanying them with the hand gesture and some seemingly Italian phrases that in fact were nothing but noises, so typical of him of course, were quite entertaining!
And after the game, I had no idea that you could find so many Italians in Brussels. They were everywhere, blocking almost every streets in downtown Brussels, dancing and cheering till morning. I felt like I was in Rome and what a bad time for a German fan to be there!
I’m happy that I had so much fun before and after the game that I could handle it rather easily. Although it’s the world game but it’s still just a game and it simply can not ruin my so far wonderful trip!
For now and since I’m in Paris, vive la France and Allez les Bleus!!!
I was in Brussels, with Ali, Leili and Marjan…Ali and Leili both die hard Italian fans and Marjan, not a real fan but enough anti-German to cheer for Italy, we were in an Italian bar with at least 100 Italians and I'd never felt lonelier in my entire life!
I have to say though, just watching those Italians, swearing and waving their hands was a huge stress reliever to be honest and watching Ali who was accompanying them with the hand gesture and some seemingly Italian phrases that in fact were nothing but noises, so typical of him of course, were quite entertaining!
And after the game, I had no idea that you could find so many Italians in Brussels. They were everywhere, blocking almost every streets in downtown Brussels, dancing and cheering till morning. I felt like I was in Rome and what a bad time for a German fan to be there!
I’m happy that I had so much fun before and after the game that I could handle it rather easily. Although it’s the world game but it’s still just a game and it simply can not ruin my so far wonderful trip!
For now and since I’m in Paris, vive la France and Allez les Bleus!!!
Saturday, July 01, 2006
Paris
I’m leaving tomorrow for Paris to attend Arash and Mana’s wedding. Couple of days in Paris, a day trip to Brussels, a daytrip to Munich if Germany reaches to the final, and a possible trip to Barcelona if I could find a good company. That’s been my plan so far.
Anybody has any idea?! Suggestion?
Anybody has any idea?! Suggestion?
Orkut’s 9 commandments!
1. You’re Profile photo should be at least from a period of your life in which you could pee on your own!
I know you’ve missed the attention you’ve been receiving when you were three, but believe me, no one fantasize a 35 years old man, in dipper!
2. You’re not here only for Activity partners and business networking if you’re profile photo is more like a Victoria Secret’s add!
Either change your photo or admit that you like attentions from people you don’t have any business with but you don’t mind to be their partner in some activities!
3. Girls, just because our country situated in the continent of Asia, you’re not qualified to call yourself Asian!
For that matter, certain other rules apply.
4. If in your profile photo, you’re in a pink bikini in Cancun, holding a Pina Colada, you can not chose Islam as your religion!
Sorry folks! Islam has some regulations that you’ve already broken a dozen of them in one picture so… get over it!
5. That gorgeous elegant lady with those dreamy eyes is not you, she’s a deceased actress called Audrey Hepburn!
I don’t know how much you hate your actual appearance, but seriously, putting up that beautiful picture there, doesn’t change anything!
6. Dragging your boyfriend into your profile picture is not cute!
There are multitudes of places where you can prove your love to your partner and Orkut’s profile photo is definitively not one of those. Changing your relationship status to committed is the decent, less pretentious way of declaring the same thing!
7. You can call yourself a Very Left liberal, if you can distinguish the difference between your left and right hands!
To be politically Very left is not a symbol of being cool, it’s choosing a life style in which your father should start paying taxes and you can’t go skiing on Monday mornings!
8. Funny and quick-witted are the compliments, OTHER PEOPLE should give to you!
If you are so obsessed to be called those, ask one of your stooges to write a testimonial for you!
9. That dark spot in the horizon could be anything from a palm tree to a lost camel. All cameras these days have a button with which you can zoom in! Next time you want to take a picture for your profile, use it!
Sorry! Since I had to go to the bathroom, I couldn’t wait for God to send the last one. You figure it out yourself.
I know you’ve missed the attention you’ve been receiving when you were three, but believe me, no one fantasize a 35 years old man, in dipper!
2. You’re not here only for Activity partners and business networking if you’re profile photo is more like a Victoria Secret’s add!
Either change your photo or admit that you like attentions from people you don’t have any business with but you don’t mind to be their partner in some activities!
3. Girls, just because our country situated in the continent of Asia, you’re not qualified to call yourself Asian!
For that matter, certain other rules apply.
4. If in your profile photo, you’re in a pink bikini in Cancun, holding a Pina Colada, you can not chose Islam as your religion!
Sorry folks! Islam has some regulations that you’ve already broken a dozen of them in one picture so… get over it!
5. That gorgeous elegant lady with those dreamy eyes is not you, she’s a deceased actress called Audrey Hepburn!
I don’t know how much you hate your actual appearance, but seriously, putting up that beautiful picture there, doesn’t change anything!
6. Dragging your boyfriend into your profile picture is not cute!
There are multitudes of places where you can prove your love to your partner and Orkut’s profile photo is definitively not one of those. Changing your relationship status to committed is the decent, less pretentious way of declaring the same thing!
7. You can call yourself a Very Left liberal, if you can distinguish the difference between your left and right hands!
To be politically Very left is not a symbol of being cool, it’s choosing a life style in which your father should start paying taxes and you can’t go skiing on Monday mornings!
8. Funny and quick-witted are the compliments, OTHER PEOPLE should give to you!
If you are so obsessed to be called those, ask one of your stooges to write a testimonial for you!
9. That dark spot in the horizon could be anything from a palm tree to a lost camel. All cameras these days have a button with which you can zoom in! Next time you want to take a picture for your profile, use it!
Sorry! Since I had to go to the bathroom, I couldn’t wait for God to send the last one. You figure it out yourself.
Friday, June 30, 2006
Deutschland über Alles - Part Five
It won’t be easy, you’ll think it strange
When I try to explain how you sucked
That you try to defend after only one goal
You won’t believe me
All you will see, is a team that has lost
And should go back home, with the tears
and you must get used to it too!
Don’t cry so loud Argentina!
The truth is you surly deserved it
When you are better, and you play defensive
You’ll pay the forfeit
And it’ll be expensive!
Have I said too much? There’s nothing more I can think of to say to you
But all you have to do is look at the tape of match! to know that every word is true……..
(Music)
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Waiting for a miracle!
In the official website of FIFA, there is a place where you can predict “Who will win the golden shoe”. Guess who’s on top of that list? Shevchenko? Ronaldinho? Klose? Crespo? Well, you’re wrong. On top of that list, there is no one but the former Asian player of the year, Mr. Ali Karimi. That's right!
Since it’s impossible to even imagine that the idea can come from anybody’s mind but that of a megalomaniac Iranian with stupidly naïve excessive optimism, we can confidently conclude that there are at least thousands of Iranians who actually were thinking, or worse, hoping that Ali Karimi would beat Zidane, Ronaldo, Figo and dozens of other great players and would win the world’s Golden shoe!
And it’s not only about football, it’s in our blood. Couple of silver and bronze medals in some scientific Olympiads for high school students; convince us that we’re the most intelligent people on the face of the earth. For no obvious reason, and where the word shameful is not good enough to describe the way we treated Persian-speaking hardworking afghan refugees in our country, we consider ourselves the most hospitable nation in the world. We also think about ourselves as the most cultured, civilized, talented and the list goes on.
Isn’t it the time to forget about Cyrus the great and the glorious Persian Empire for once, and really assess who we are and where we’re standing right now, what’s our real potentials and what we can realistically achieve in a short or long term period?
The inconvenient truth (sorry Mr. Gore!) is, miracles almost never happen and in the best-case scenario, people will achieve what they’ve planed for and they’ve worked for. I suppose we still think too poetic to face this fact!
Since it’s impossible to even imagine that the idea can come from anybody’s mind but that of a megalomaniac Iranian with stupidly naïve excessive optimism, we can confidently conclude that there are at least thousands of Iranians who actually were thinking, or worse, hoping that Ali Karimi would beat Zidane, Ronaldo, Figo and dozens of other great players and would win the world’s Golden shoe!
And it’s not only about football, it’s in our blood. Couple of silver and bronze medals in some scientific Olympiads for high school students; convince us that we’re the most intelligent people on the face of the earth. For no obvious reason, and where the word shameful is not good enough to describe the way we treated Persian-speaking hardworking afghan refugees in our country, we consider ourselves the most hospitable nation in the world. We also think about ourselves as the most cultured, civilized, talented and the list goes on.
Isn’t it the time to forget about Cyrus the great and the glorious Persian Empire for once, and really assess who we are and where we’re standing right now, what’s our real potentials and what we can realistically achieve in a short or long term period?
The inconvenient truth (sorry Mr. Gore!) is, miracles almost never happen and in the best-case scenario, people will achieve what they’ve planed for and they’ve worked for. I suppose we still think too poetic to face this fact!
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Monday, June 26, 2006
Sunday, June 25, 2006
Being civilized…remember that?!
Great…I stayed at home to watch the match, that was expected to be beautiful, but God, what a shame. It was one of the most disgusting, unfair and repelling matches ever. I can’t even say that I’m sorry for Netherlands cause they were horrendous too. The winner of this stupid game is truly England who will play with “Port” which is Portugal without Deco, Ronaldo and Costinha. I think British were the only people who really enjoyed that game.
Anyway, that shameful win was good enough for Montréal’s Portuguese community to come to the streets, dance, drink, and celebrate. As we were going to TamTam, we participate in their celebration, while we were swearing them in Persian “ Khaak too saretoon baa in team etoon!”. Surly with a smile so they think we are appreciating their catastrophic win!
After all, lying down beneath the mild, beautiful sun and a delicious diner at my favorite place, cafe santropol, made the post-game hours, a pleasing Sunday afternoon.
I also bought a cool Tibetan shirt that I’m not sure whether I’ll wear it or not, cause it’s so not my style. Anyway, I might give it a try.
Anyway, that shameful win was good enough for Montréal’s Portuguese community to come to the streets, dance, drink, and celebrate. As we were going to TamTam, we participate in their celebration, while we were swearing them in Persian “ Khaak too saretoon baa in team etoon!”. Surly with a smile so they think we are appreciating their catastrophic win!
After all, lying down beneath the mild, beautiful sun and a delicious diner at my favorite place, cafe santropol, made the post-game hours, a pleasing Sunday afternoon.
I also bought a cool Tibetan shirt that I’m not sure whether I’ll wear it or not, cause it’s so not my style. Anyway, I might give it a try.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Great Moments in Presidential Speeches
Apart from the fact that he’s screwing our planet, I love that buffoon! He’s so funny. I’d really like to be his friend, being invited to his ranch in Texas. I think I’d have the laugh of my life….
Deutschland über alles! Part four
Yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah…That was a nice match…Germany was soooooo good. I didn’t appreciate the red card though. It rather killed the game. The referee could have easily overlooked that foul and let the match continue. It gets on my nerve when the referee ruins a brilliant match, just to be meticulously punctual, just like what happened in the 1998’s match between England and Argentina!
To be a German fan, you have to be as punctual as them. We, my German friend and I, were there, at café Berlin, 10:00 o’clock sharp but it was jam-packed. To be honest, I’d never seen so many white people together anywhere in North America :)
So we went to St-Laurent and we found another great place, where we could watch the match outside, under the sunshine. Beer and Cheer and a good victory.
By the way, to those who’re still so biased that even what they’re seeing can’t change their minds, Klinsmann, even when they were two goals ahead, substituted a forward for another one. I really like to see the same move from those so called “Offensive” teams! So till then, shut up please!
We are going to kick some Argentinean ass next time…
P.S. Why the hell, Oliver Kahn was more depressed than Sweden’s coach?! Cheer up man!
Friday, June 23, 2006
Thursday, June 22, 2006
Episode One,
He’s not drunk. He’s just OK, twirling his glass. He loves the color of this scotch, the smoky fragrance and the ice cubes, dancing around inside this fine Glenlivet.
He closes his eyes and imagines himself being those ice cubes. She gets smoother, tastier and somehow better, like this single malt, as he’s melting away inside of her.
He takes a sip, closes his eyes one more time and enjoys, as the scotch warms his throat down to his stomach. It tastes great, so does life!
Episode Two,
He’s still there and he’s still twirling his glass. The sound of the ice cubes inside an empty old fashion glass sooths him. He closes his eyes…again.
Now, she’s just like these shrunk ice cubes. They’re both melting away to something that doesn’t make him feel any better anymore.
“Do you want another glass of that Sir?”
“No thanks…just a double espresso… and the bill…please”
He continues twirling. It makes the ice cubes melt faster but he, just likes the sound.
Episode Three,
Another day, another bar, the same man. Well, almost the same.
“What can I serve you Sir”
He thinks…he clears his throat and says:
“Talisker…straight”
He’s not drunk. He’s just OK, twirling his glass. He loves the color of this scotch, the smoky fragrance and the ice cubes, dancing around inside this fine Glenlivet.
He closes his eyes and imagines himself being those ice cubes. She gets smoother, tastier and somehow better, like this single malt, as he’s melting away inside of her.
He takes a sip, closes his eyes one more time and enjoys, as the scotch warms his throat down to his stomach. It tastes great, so does life!
Episode Two,
He’s still there and he’s still twirling his glass. The sound of the ice cubes inside an empty old fashion glass sooths him. He closes his eyes…again.
Now, she’s just like these shrunk ice cubes. They’re both melting away to something that doesn’t make him feel any better anymore.
“Do you want another glass of that Sir?”
“No thanks…just a double espresso… and the bill…please”
He continues twirling. It makes the ice cubes melt faster but he, just likes the sound.
Episode Three,
Another day, another bar, the same man. Well, almost the same.
“What can I serve you Sir”
He thinks…he clears his throat and says:
“Talisker…straight”
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
The Lake House
I really enjoy reducing the traditional, mysterious and almost divine concept of love, to a pure bio-physical effect of some hormones (such as endorphin, serotonin, norephinephrin and later on, oxytocin) and genetic congruency but even if that’s the case, we’re missing a very important physical phenomenon here, called timing and the movie, The lake house, looks at this matter, within a remarkable, ingenious and amazingly strange love story.Alex and Kate, a frustrated architect and a lonely doctor, write to each other everyday in a bizarre and seemingly long distance relationship where in fact two years time difference is what creates the distance. In this odd situation, an old mailbox, a dog and a breathtakingly beautiful lake house are the elements that connect them together and all these happen in Chicago, in front of a carefully picked backdrop of the most prominent buildings of this architecturally rich city. That’s all I can say about the story without revealing it more than what the trailer does.
The plot is well structured, cute and full of surprises and while it’s totally fictional, it strictly develops within its logical frame which makes it, although a bit hard to follow but quite believable. The screenwriter, David Auburn proves that with a little bit of imagination and talent, it’s possible to make something brilliantly unique out of a well worn-out genre.
As negatives, I didn’t appreciate the ending that much and the movie tends to get boring as it moves toward it. The dialogues about architecture, specially after all those impressive images, seem redundant and even pretentious. Performances are not impressive either but since neither Keanu Reeves nor Sandra Bullock are exceptional actors, I didn’t expect more. However, I enjoyed the performances of the supporting actors, Christopher Plummer and Shohreh Aghdashloo who is quite charming in this movie.
The lake house itself, which has been specifically designed and constructed for this movie, is to die for. During the film, I couldn’t stop fancying about living in this house for at least a full year. It’s artistically harmonious with the surrounding environment and voluptuously transparent and exposed.
Final word, I’m still a bit reluctant to call this movie a masterpiece or put it in my favorite list, but it’s a movie, definitively worth watching and absolutely satisfying by all means.
Bordelle Français!
You remember how every Bureaucratic procedure in Iran sucked? Today, I kind of understand why. The modern administrations have been imported to Iran from France and God, what a mistake it was. Like buying red wine from Norway!
Today, Sanam and I, went to Consulat Generale de France a Montreal to pick up our Visas. We were there at 7:00 AM sharp, and we were thinking about maximum an hour and half, two hours waiting. right? WRONG! It was, as French say, “un Bordelle!”. It’s even worse since if a Bordelle wants to work such disorganized, it will be bankrupt in matter of weeks!
It took us 2 hours in line, a breakfast, 2 hours of chatting and having coffee in 3 different places, some shopping, watching a bit football and half an hour walking in McGill College street, looking at beautiful models, who were practicing for the opening night of the Fashion and Design festival starting tonight for 5 days.
Exactly! 6 hours to get our visas stamped in our passports! Their printer had problem and the general consulate of France in Montreal, the second largest French-speaking city in the world, doesn’t have a backup printer!
Anyway, the cons: I missed 4 hours of training for the new software, our company has bought recently and I’m also dying from lack of sleep!
But pros: I really enjoyed this magnificent sunshine and delightful weather, with the company of the sweetest girl I know, according to everybody, myself included!
It’s good to skip work sometimes to somehow remember how days look like! Plus…I got my visa , and my ticket and now I’m looking forward to Arash and Mana’s wedding. I can’t wait to see all my dear friends from l’Auberge Montrealais, once again.…so Paris, here I come!
Today, Sanam and I, went to Consulat Generale de France a Montreal to pick up our Visas. We were there at 7:00 AM sharp, and we were thinking about maximum an hour and half, two hours waiting. right? WRONG! It was, as French say, “un Bordelle!”. It’s even worse since if a Bordelle wants to work such disorganized, it will be bankrupt in matter of weeks!
It took us 2 hours in line, a breakfast, 2 hours of chatting and having coffee in 3 different places, some shopping, watching a bit football and half an hour walking in McGill College street, looking at beautiful models, who were practicing for the opening night of the Fashion and Design festival starting tonight for 5 days.
Exactly! 6 hours to get our visas stamped in our passports! Their printer had problem and the general consulate of France in Montreal, the second largest French-speaking city in the world, doesn’t have a backup printer!
Anyway, the cons: I missed 4 hours of training for the new software, our company has bought recently and I’m also dying from lack of sleep!
But pros: I really enjoyed this magnificent sunshine and delightful weather, with the company of the sweetest girl I know, according to everybody, myself included!
It’s good to skip work sometimes to somehow remember how days look like! Plus…I got my visa , and my ticket and now I’m looking forward to Arash and Mana’s wedding. I can’t wait to see all my dear friends from l’Auberge Montrealais, once again.…so Paris, here I come!
Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Revelation of the very last remaining brain cell
If God and Saints get credit for victories, they should be equally blamed for defeats!
I mean, why the hell, every time we win a football match, they rave about how the triumph was specifically related to the assistance from “God” , “Faateme Zahra!” or “A’emme ie Athaar!” but when we lose, they just dismiss the coach and destroy Ali Daei’s properties?!
I don’t mind if you want to praise your Lord for every trivial achievement but at least, after a humiliating defeat, have the guts to show your dissatisfaction to him by doing something outrageous like… not praying for couple of days… or having pork chops with Vodka… or simply use your brain for a while!
P.S. Having sex with your domestic animals doesn’t count! It’s almost allowed!
I mean, why the hell, every time we win a football match, they rave about how the triumph was specifically related to the assistance from “God” , “Faateme Zahra!” or “A’emme ie Athaar!” but when we lose, they just dismiss the coach and destroy Ali Daei’s properties?!
I don’t mind if you want to praise your Lord for every trivial achievement but at least, after a humiliating defeat, have the guts to show your dissatisfaction to him by doing something outrageous like… not praying for couple of days… or having pork chops with Vodka… or simply use your brain for a while!
P.S. Having sex with your domestic animals doesn’t count! It’s almost allowed!
Deutschland über alles
Yoohoooo….9 points
I’m not going to check the world cup history, but I’m sure in the past two decades that I’m a fan of Germany; they never managed to get all 9 points even the time they had one of the best squad in the history of the world cup, obviously I mean Kaiser’s team.
Although I have to admit, they never did to us, what Azzurri’s have done and they’re still doing to their fans. Poor Ali! To be a fan of an inconsistent team is like to getting married to an unstable person. It’s even worse, cause you can’t get divorce, so it’s more like a Catholic marriage!
Anyway, my colleague Stephanie and I, are looking for a Bar where we can watch the match together, probably with lots of other fans of Germany. It’s nice to watch the game with a passionate German girl and sing Deutschland...Deutschland über alles
I’m not going to check the world cup history, but I’m sure in the past two decades that I’m a fan of Germany; they never managed to get all 9 points even the time they had one of the best squad in the history of the world cup, obviously I mean Kaiser’s team.
Although I have to admit, they never did to us, what Azzurri’s have done and they’re still doing to their fans. Poor Ali! To be a fan of an inconsistent team is like to getting married to an unstable person. It’s even worse, cause you can’t get divorce, so it’s more like a Catholic marriage!
Anyway, my colleague Stephanie and I, are looking for a Bar where we can watch the match together, probably with lots of other fans of Germany. It’s nice to watch the game with a passionate German girl and sing Deutschland...Deutschland über alles
Monday, June 19, 2006
4. My favorite 101
One of the most brilliant, moving, thoughtful and meticulously executed film that I’ve ever seen, is a Japanese movie called After life by Hirokazu Koreeda In an old Japanese residence, very much like a school with no resemblance to what we perceive as after life, the deceased individuals are provided with films, photos and slides of their lives, and they should choose one, and only one memory to eternally live that memory. In other word, the poetic concept of their after life is simply to live in the most favorite moment of their lives, forever.
And you’re dead wrong if you think since I gave up the plot, there’s no reason for you to see this movie if you haven’t seen it already cause there are so many beautiful moments, thoughts and ideas as well as sceneries, presented in after life that nobody can ruin the film just by telling you the storyline.
Now, inspired by this movie, imagine that you should pick a composer, and this composer would be the only one you are allowed to listen to, till the end of time. What would be your choice?
For me, the answer, simply and quickly, would be Johan Sebastian Bach. He has made so many breath taking pieces that one really needs an eternal life, only to fully squeeze every drop of divine pleasure out of this heavenly collection of sounds.
So it’s no wonder if I have dozens of Bach’s pieces among my favorite 101. For today, Erbarme Dich from St Mattew Passion, but instead of the original choral version, this lovely arrangement by Yo-Yo Ma, played by himself, from the album Simply Baroque.
It simultaneously satisfies my mutual passion for Bach and the magical voice of my favorite instrument, cello.
Friday, June 16, 2006
Why men are happier than women!
I recieved this today as an E-mail from a lady-friend of mine,
Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple
creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding
plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You
can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white
T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car
mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have
to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too
icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a
bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress
$5000. Tux rental -$100. People never stare at your chest when you're
talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically
expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood
all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about
tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open
all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of
thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still
be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are
more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You
are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face
stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe
decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your
big hips. One wallet an d one pair of shoes -- one color for all
seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can
"do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice
concerning growing a mustache..
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
Men Are Just Happier People-- What do you expect from such simple
creatures? Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding
plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You
can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white
T-shirt to a water park. You can wear NO shirt to a water park. Car
mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have
to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too
icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a
bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress
$5000. Tux rental -$100. People never stare at your chest when you're
talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically
expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood
all the time.
Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about
tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open
all your own jars. You get extra credit for the slightest act of
thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still
be your friend.
Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are
more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You
are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes. Everything on your face
stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe
decades. You only have to shave your face and neck.
You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your
big hips. One wallet an d one pair of shoes -- one color for all
seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look. You can
"do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice
concerning growing a mustache..
You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.
No wonder men are happier.
My Colombian ladies!
According to Francisco Fernandez, the director of the Road safety foundation, distraction, causing around 20% of the road accidents, is the most notorious cause of the awfully higher-than-average number of car accidents in Colombia.
Now read this,
The main distracters are, cell phones with 53% and the presence of beautiful women with the ridicules share of 32%!
Basically, in Colombia, looking at the beautiful women is the main reason of almost 6.4% of the all accidents in the roads!
Absolutely no comment!
Now read this,
The main distracters are, cell phones with 53% and the presence of beautiful women with the ridicules share of 32%!
Basically, in Colombia, looking at the beautiful women is the main reason of almost 6.4% of the all accidents in the roads!
Absolutely no comment!
Missing!
The picture you see, belongs to a 31 years old, allegedly male! who, from the moment he’s heard I’m going to stay at his place, has left his residency and has not returned.Since the above mentioned, has a brilliant memory, apparently he has deliberately gone missing!
Any information will be rewarded (and help me to figure out, whether I should pack or not!)
Remember…we want your information…not your name!
9/11 conspiracy
No matter you believe in conspiracy or you don’t, it’s a brilliant work of investigation, worth spending one hour of your time for. Some of the eivdence are downright undeniable even for skeptic like myself!
Thursday, June 15, 2006
3. My Favorite 101
The only considerable weakness of mine in front of women is when I confront a charming elegant lady who speaks French with a cute Parisian accent and it’s so serious that if someday I want to live with someone, either she should be a cute Parisian or we should live somewhere quite far from Paris!Now you can imagine when one of the most beautiful girls in the world, whose exquisiteness alone is a tasteful song for the eyes, whispers this lovely romantic chanson, in French and with her soft, feminine voice, I have no choice but to put her in my favorite list and feel happy, just to be alive to appreciate it.
So today’s favorite is Carla Bruni , singing Le ciel dans une chambre from the album Quelqu’un m’a dit.
Revelations of the very last remaining brain cell!
Dear players in the world cup,
Please do not bug God that much by thanking him for every tedious Goal you score or you save! I mean, do you really think he’s sitting there, controlling every spin on your stupid ball! or somehow bends the bar to prevent the ball from going in?!
Even if you’re a creationist, do you thank the programmers in EA electronics every time you score a Goal in FIFA 2006?!
Fellows, if he’s God, he should be able to perform some automation. You can call it laws of physics. I don’t mind if you want to believe in God but at least give this God of yours a bit more credit!
By the way, if he’s going to bend the rules one day, I really prefer him to spend his talent on solving the global warming rather than help Trinidad and Tobago beat Paraguay!
P.S. I’m really in favor of the ancient system of polytheism. This way, we could dedicate a God only for football and then, the rest of the world wouldn’t become a pain in the ass of the other important Gods, so they could do something about the shit which is going on in the wolrd!
Please do not bug God that much by thanking him for every tedious Goal you score or you save! I mean, do you really think he’s sitting there, controlling every spin on your stupid ball! or somehow bends the bar to prevent the ball from going in?!
Even if you’re a creationist, do you thank the programmers in EA electronics every time you score a Goal in FIFA 2006?!
Fellows, if he’s God, he should be able to perform some automation. You can call it laws of physics. I don’t mind if you want to believe in God but at least give this God of yours a bit more credit!
By the way, if he’s going to bend the rules one day, I really prefer him to spend his talent on solving the global warming rather than help Trinidad and Tobago beat Paraguay!
P.S. I’m really in favor of the ancient system of polytheism. This way, we could dedicate a God only for football and then, the rest of the world wouldn’t become a pain in the ass of the other important Gods, so they could do something about the shit which is going on in the wolrd!
Wednesday, June 14, 2006
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
And no one kills the children anymore...
Today is World day against child labor. According to UN figures, some 218 million children all around the globe are forced to work instead of being send to school, as a natural right of every child.
Children as young as 8, are working in copper mines in Sub-Saharan Africa, and yet there are quite lucky compared to those being exploited in growing, profitable international sex-trade market or those who’ve been trained as soldiers, to fight and kill before they get to 14 and catastrophically, the list goes on.
And yet, these statistics do not take into consideration, millions of children, being abused by incompetent parents, mentally, physically and even sexually.
Couple of days ago, I was watching Alan Parker’s The wall again. One can hardly find any work that shows the dark side of the harsh childhood memories on the future lives of the children, better than this Pink Floyd’s masterpiece.
Yet I was thinking, since it’s absurd to even suggest comparing the childhood of Bob Geldof’s Character in The wall with what these poor kids are going through, what kind of people these children will grow up to be and what kind of the world they’re going to make!
The god of children must have been dead, quite long ago.
Children as young as 8, are working in copper mines in Sub-Saharan Africa, and yet there are quite lucky compared to those being exploited in growing, profitable international sex-trade market or those who’ve been trained as soldiers, to fight and kill before they get to 14 and catastrophically, the list goes on.
And yet, these statistics do not take into consideration, millions of children, being abused by incompetent parents, mentally, physically and even sexually.
Couple of days ago, I was watching Alan Parker’s The wall again. One can hardly find any work that shows the dark side of the harsh childhood memories on the future lives of the children, better than this Pink Floyd’s masterpiece.
Yet I was thinking, since it’s absurd to even suggest comparing the childhood of Bob Geldof’s Character in The wall with what these poor kids are going through, what kind of people these children will grow up to be and what kind of the world they’re going to make!
The god of children must have been dead, quite long ago.
Today was Diane’s birthday, so we went to an Irish pub for lunch where this hilarious sign caught my eyes.
In contrary to what the sign says, the waitress was a lovely, cute and polite Irish lady who was pregnant too ( well, since I mentioned Irish before, the pregnant part was kind of unnecessary).
I don’t know if it’s the effect of the age or what, but lately, I’m finding pregnant women attractive and even sometimes sexy. That’s new for sure!
Monday, June 12, 2006
2. My favorite 101
I know It’s the least Bob Dylan-type song ever but somehow I like it the most (no offense Bob!)
Since everybody knows both the song and the signer so well, I skip the introduction part. So This week’s pick is Things have changed from the album The essential Bob Dylan
Bill Maher's New rule!
Bluetooth headset users have to do something that lets me know that you’re just on the phone and not a dangerous schizophrenic! Right?! We don’t know if you’re talking to you secretary or the evil leprechaun who lives in your head!
You’re not the chief communications officer of the starship Enterprise, you’re a shoe salesman asking your mom if you can bring over your laundry!
If I wanted to overhear every tedious scrap of brain static, rattling around in your head, I’d read your blog!
You’re not the chief communications officer of the starship Enterprise, you’re a shoe salesman asking your mom if you can bring over your laundry!
If I wanted to overhear every tedious scrap of brain static, rattling around in your head, I’d read your blog!
Episode one
We were walking in the rain and almost alone in the street. On Saturday afternoon and when it rains like that, there are few people crazy enough to wander around the city but our days was short and even if we were not as crazy, we had no choice.
After an as-always-great brunch in L’avenue, coffee in amazingly unique café esperanza, we were walking in one of those so typical-of-Plateau, super charming narrow back –yard-streets and her shoes were utterly wet so were her socks and her jeans.
Right where most of the girls would nag the hell out of the guy and would kill the day by taking a cab home, she went to a shoe store, bought a 10$ pink rubber boots and a pair of socks.
Ten minutes later, her wet shoes and socks in a bag, we were back on those narrow streets and I was thinking to myself, I could have been the happiest man on earth!
Episode two
We were in Tamtam, almost completely high…she was sitting down on the green grass, my head on her lap. I was enjoying the rhythm, coming from far away, dancing of the leaves above me, gentle breeze on my face, massaging hands of the lately-so-scarce sunshine and most of all, her indescribably-pleasing company.
Then I saw my reflection on her sunglasses, right above her mysterious smile and I saved the moment on the memory card…the moment I knew wouldn’t last but was so beautiful, I didn’t want to imagine it otherwise.
Episode Three
Three is this seat in the bus, exactly over the tires, where right in front of the seat, there is an inclined surface; you can put your feet on. That’s the most relaxing hence my favorite spot in the bus.
She’d just left and I was coming back from Berri-Uquam station and was watching her numerous photos on my camera. Right beside me, there was this polite, classy lady with his super sweet, curious no-more-than-4-years-old boy on her lap and he was dying to see what I was doing.
And I, couldn’t stand him so willing to see the pictures, put the camera on slide show and in front him. Suddenly, he became amazingly quite, deliciously focused on the pictures, passing by every three seconds.
The mother, trying to appreciate my gesture, started asking him questions and he was charmingly nodding.
"Monsieur is so nice…did you thank him for showing his pictures to you?"
"The pictures are great, aren’t they?"
"She is so beautiful, isn’t she?"
Out of the blue, she looked at me and asked in a way, she couldn’t expect anything but confirmation in return, "Is she your girlfriend?"
I paused and then….smiled…I just didn’t feel like to say no…and she smiled back…To smart people, you shouldn’t explain everything and that’s what I like about them.
I looked back at the boy. He wasn’t looking at the screen anymore cause something equally irrelevant had caught his attention and he was so drowned in the new thing, you could hardly believe that a minute ago, he was eating the pictures by his curiosity.
How I wish I was a little boy!
We were walking in the rain and almost alone in the street. On Saturday afternoon and when it rains like that, there are few people crazy enough to wander around the city but our days was short and even if we were not as crazy, we had no choice.
After an as-always-great brunch in L’avenue, coffee in amazingly unique café esperanza, we were walking in one of those so typical-of-Plateau, super charming narrow back –yard-streets and her shoes were utterly wet so were her socks and her jeans.
Right where most of the girls would nag the hell out of the guy and would kill the day by taking a cab home, she went to a shoe store, bought a 10$ pink rubber boots and a pair of socks.
Ten minutes later, her wet shoes and socks in a bag, we were back on those narrow streets and I was thinking to myself, I could have been the happiest man on earth!
Episode two
We were in Tamtam, almost completely high…she was sitting down on the green grass, my head on her lap. I was enjoying the rhythm, coming from far away, dancing of the leaves above me, gentle breeze on my face, massaging hands of the lately-so-scarce sunshine and most of all, her indescribably-pleasing company.
Then I saw my reflection on her sunglasses, right above her mysterious smile and I saved the moment on the memory card…the moment I knew wouldn’t last but was so beautiful, I didn’t want to imagine it otherwise.
Episode Three
Three is this seat in the bus, exactly over the tires, where right in front of the seat, there is an inclined surface; you can put your feet on. That’s the most relaxing hence my favorite spot in the bus.
She’d just left and I was coming back from Berri-Uquam station and was watching her numerous photos on my camera. Right beside me, there was this polite, classy lady with his super sweet, curious no-more-than-4-years-old boy on her lap and he was dying to see what I was doing.
And I, couldn’t stand him so willing to see the pictures, put the camera on slide show and in front him. Suddenly, he became amazingly quite, deliciously focused on the pictures, passing by every three seconds.
The mother, trying to appreciate my gesture, started asking him questions and he was charmingly nodding.
"Monsieur is so nice…did you thank him for showing his pictures to you?"
"The pictures are great, aren’t they?"
"She is so beautiful, isn’t she?"
Out of the blue, she looked at me and asked in a way, she couldn’t expect anything but confirmation in return, "Is she your girlfriend?"
I paused and then….smiled…I just didn’t feel like to say no…and she smiled back…To smart people, you shouldn’t explain everything and that’s what I like about them.
I looked back at the boy. He wasn’t looking at the screen anymore cause something equally irrelevant had caught his attention and he was so drowned in the new thing, you could hardly believe that a minute ago, he was eating the pictures by his curiosity.
How I wish I was a little boy!
Friday, June 09, 2006
Thursday, June 08, 2006
A fantastic place called TAM-TAM
Every sunny Sunday, the eastern slope of Mont-royal, is the place where the coolest people in the world gather, playing Tam-Tam or any sort of percussion that can create a moving afro-rhythm. Then, the rest of the crowd, already big-time high, dancing to this rhythm or just lying on the green grass and enjoying their Sunday afternoon!
The mood is so relax and friendly, you can hardly recall that you’re in always busy North America, and the style of the people, gives the impression of being in 60’s. it’s truly amazing.
Another interesting stuff about Tam-Tam (that’s not the name but that’s what people call it), is a game, very much like a Medieval Paintball in which geeks, dressed in ancient armors, equipped with foam-made war fare, simulate a medieval war! It’s so funny you’ll laugh your ass off…the two groups stand in front of each other, bump on their shields and attacking each other while screaming….
I’m going to gradually update some of the photos that I took from them, in my flickr. So , Check it out
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
World Cup…
Dear friends, guess the final scores of Iran’s three matches…I will announce the winner at the end of the competition.
A. Iran Vs Mexico
B. Iran Vs Portugal
C. Iran Vs Angola
Rules:
The exact result: 20 points
The winner and the correct goal difference: 10 points
Only the winner: 5 points
Good luck
A. Iran Vs Mexico
B. Iran Vs Portugal
C. Iran Vs Angola
Rules:
The exact result: 20 points
The winner and the correct goal difference: 10 points
Only the winner: 5 points
Good luck
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
a Haiku
New Year’s Day
Everything is in blossom!
I feel about average
The snow is melting
and the village is flooded
With children
Don’t worry, spiders,
I keep house
Casually
Issa
Everything is in blossom!
I feel about average
The snow is melting
and the village is flooded
With children
Don’t worry, spiders,
I keep house
Casually
Issa
Uncomfortable situations
That’s an invitation for you to share funny uncomfortable situations you have recently experienced . Be sincere, be impolite, be my guest!
So let me start first…
Public Bathrooms are among the very few places, I believe, should be separated based on genders. Men and women using the same public bathroom, BAD IDEA! and I tell you why.
To start with, every time you want to leave the bathroom to a lady, you’re faced with this dilemma: “Should I leave the toilet seat up or should I put it back down?”. Sounds funny ha?! Now, If you leave it down, she’d think you’re a pig, actually peed on the toilet seat, but if you leave it up, then she’d still be thinking, you’re just a natural stereotype male pig! You see, it’s not that funny!
Anyway, unfortunately mixed bathroom is the case in our office and today, when I entered the bathroom to wash my hands, it was like I entered the site of a medieval battle field where thousands of people got killed and their bodies have been left under the scorching summer sun for weeks! As if the guy had eaten some dead rats for breakfast!
Any way, I washed my hands as fast as possible, while holding my breath, and as I was getting out of the bathroom, guess what? I found myself, face to face with the only girl in the office whom I actually have a crush on, waiting to go after me!
Ok…I’m waiting for your bloopers!
So let me start first…
Public Bathrooms are among the very few places, I believe, should be separated based on genders. Men and women using the same public bathroom, BAD IDEA! and I tell you why.
To start with, every time you want to leave the bathroom to a lady, you’re faced with this dilemma: “Should I leave the toilet seat up or should I put it back down?”. Sounds funny ha?! Now, If you leave it down, she’d think you’re a pig, actually peed on the toilet seat, but if you leave it up, then she’d still be thinking, you’re just a natural stereotype male pig! You see, it’s not that funny!
Anyway, unfortunately mixed bathroom is the case in our office and today, when I entered the bathroom to wash my hands, it was like I entered the site of a medieval battle field where thousands of people got killed and their bodies have been left under the scorching summer sun for weeks! As if the guy had eaten some dead rats for breakfast!
Any way, I washed my hands as fast as possible, while holding my breath, and as I was getting out of the bathroom, guess what? I found myself, face to face with the only girl in the office whom I actually have a crush on, waiting to go after me!
Ok…I’m waiting for your bloopers!
Monday, June 05, 2006
Saturday, June 03, 2006
Movie of the week - Part Two
Wu ji (Promise)
If you have a reasonable tolerance for a corny Chinese fairy tale, can stand not-so-pleasing-to-the-ears Mandarin for two hours and can overlook some far-less-than-perfect special effects, invite your eyes to one the most extravagant feasts of colors and visual magnificence!
The latest work of Chen Kaige, was so unbelievably beautiful that I was frequently laughing out loud, just to discharge my self from the unbearable endless load of beauty, from heavenly landscapes, to every little colorful details in outfits, armors and even wall papers. Add to those, an exquisite music, and a gorgeous actress, and you will have an exhibition of everything your senses could wish for.
Just sit back, forget about the story and let your senses explore this sensual orgasm. (Why the hell I do sound like the commercials for shampoo!?!)
If you have a reasonable tolerance for a corny Chinese fairy tale, can stand not-so-pleasing-to-the-ears Mandarin for two hours and can overlook some far-less-than-perfect special effects, invite your eyes to one the most extravagant feasts of colors and visual magnificence!The latest work of Chen Kaige, was so unbelievably beautiful that I was frequently laughing out loud, just to discharge my self from the unbearable endless load of beauty, from heavenly landscapes, to every little colorful details in outfits, armors and even wall papers. Add to those, an exquisite music, and a gorgeous actress, and you will have an exhibition of everything your senses could wish for.
Just sit back, forget about the story and let your senses explore this sensual orgasm. (Why the hell I do sound like the commercials for shampoo!?!)
Movie of the week - Part one
UNITED 93
Remember that glorious scene in Bowling for columbine where Michael Moore, connects some of the most notorious US interventions in third world countries, like Iran, El Salvador and Chile from one side and the creation of Taliban and Bin Laden by CIA from the other side, to 9/11, sarcastically with the background song of What a wonderful world? Or that episode from 11'9''01, in which Ken Loach, who recently won the Palm d’or for The wind that shakes the barely, compares September eleventh 2001 to September eleventh 1973, when the airplane we thought was going to hit the world trade center suddenly turned out to be the one, was going to bomb Allende’s presidential palace? Or Sean penn’s short, overwhelmingly poetic and stunningly beautiful episode in the same movie?
Well, if you wish to see something quite different, see United 93, in which Paul Greengrass , has managed to make an extraordinary documentary-type movie, very much similar to his master piece Bloody Sunday.
The movie is simple, realistic and quite unlike anything else that we have seen so far. There is no love story, no degusting toast, no cheesy emotional speech of any kind, no hero, no irritating wise guy or superman, no criticism, no sarcasm, no bombarding audience with boring facts, and most of all, no demonizing of anyone whatsoever.
It’s just a real story, being told as non-judgmental as possible with performances so natural and believable that you can put yourself in place of anybody, from terrified passengers to puzzled and desperate personnels, in the control rooms.
Paul Greengrass, knowing the event itself has all the necessary elements for an emotional thriller to it, by simply retelling the September eleventh, has created a true masterpiece which is extraordinary observant, emotional and breathtaking.
So far, one of the best movies of the year.
Remember that glorious scene in Bowling for columbine where Michael Moore, connects some of the most notorious US interventions in third world countries, like Iran, El Salvador and Chile from one side and the creation of Taliban and Bin Laden by CIA from the other side, to 9/11, sarcastically with the background song of What a wonderful world? Or that episode from 11'9''01, in which Ken Loach, who recently won the Palm d’or for The wind that shakes the barely, compares September eleventh 2001 to September eleventh 1973, when the airplane we thought was going to hit the world trade center suddenly turned out to be the one, was going to bomb Allende’s presidential palace? Or Sean penn’s short, overwhelmingly poetic and stunningly beautiful episode in the same movie?
Well, if you wish to see something quite different, see United 93, in which Paul Greengrass , has managed to make an extraordinary documentary-type movie, very much similar to his master piece Bloody Sunday.
The movie is simple, realistic and quite unlike anything else that we have seen so far. There is no love story, no degusting toast, no cheesy emotional speech of any kind, no hero, no irritating wise guy or superman, no criticism, no sarcasm, no bombarding audience with boring facts, and most of all, no demonizing of anyone whatsoever.
It’s just a real story, being told as non-judgmental as possible with performances so natural and believable that you can put yourself in place of anybody, from terrified passengers to puzzled and desperate personnels, in the control rooms.
Paul Greengrass, knowing the event itself has all the necessary elements for an emotional thriller to it, by simply retelling the September eleventh, has created a true masterpiece which is extraordinary observant, emotional and breathtaking.
So far, one of the best movies of the year.
1. My favorite 101
I start my favorites with a song called “Green Grass” by this young beautiful Brazilian, Cibelle, from the album The shine of dried electric leaves .She sings in Portuguese, obviously, and also in English and French.
Although those in Portuguese, with a hint of Bossa Nova, are more typical of her, I can’t stop listening to this magnificent song, Green grass, which is immensely romantic, simple, melancholic and down right delicious. Very much suitable for this beautiful rainy Saturday evening.
Friday, June 02, 2006
Discussion of the week- Episode one
In most developed countries, a pregnant woman carrying a baby with Down ’s syndrome (the inoffensive term for rather rude and irresponsible word of Mongol!), is allowed to have an abortion. In England as an example, more than 95% of women, trapped in this condition, have used their legal right, terminated the life of their unborn children.
There are many people oppose to that decision, among which many families who have first hand experience dealing with Down’s children. They’re arguing, having a slow or crippled rate of growth, even though in the brain, doesn’t make those babies any lesser form of human being and certainly doesn’t give us the right to terminate their lives and some of these babies, having a chance to lead their lives, can live a long, happy one and can bring joy to their families as well. Depriving them from living, is killing someone just for being different.
Considering the fact that our world is being ruled by people with much more serious brain defects than Down’s syndrome, it seems not a bad argument. (Just kidding!)
On the other side of the spectrum, many believe that the life of the one with this syndrome is a wretched one, not only for the person alone, but for the family who will be doomed to bear an excruciating life-long responsibility. They also argue that, since some of these patients will outlive their parents, the devastating duty will eventually fall off on the shoulders of their brothers and sisters, who had no control over the decision in the first place. So it’s the right of every family, not to be forced, at least, to accept this huge task. Adding to this, most of these children, would suffer from serious physical defects throughout their lives and frequently should be subjected to some painful surgeries, which makes the life even more difficult for them and their families.
What do you think? Should parents be allowed to terminate the life of the fetus, knowing that the baby will be born with Down’s syndrome? And if you were in the same situation, would you do that?
There are many people oppose to that decision, among which many families who have first hand experience dealing with Down’s children. They’re arguing, having a slow or crippled rate of growth, even though in the brain, doesn’t make those babies any lesser form of human being and certainly doesn’t give us the right to terminate their lives and some of these babies, having a chance to lead their lives, can live a long, happy one and can bring joy to their families as well. Depriving them from living, is killing someone just for being different.
Considering the fact that our world is being ruled by people with much more serious brain defects than Down’s syndrome, it seems not a bad argument. (Just kidding!)
On the other side of the spectrum, many believe that the life of the one with this syndrome is a wretched one, not only for the person alone, but for the family who will be doomed to bear an excruciating life-long responsibility. They also argue that, since some of these patients will outlive their parents, the devastating duty will eventually fall off on the shoulders of their brothers and sisters, who had no control over the decision in the first place. So it’s the right of every family, not to be forced, at least, to accept this huge task. Adding to this, most of these children, would suffer from serious physical defects throughout their lives and frequently should be subjected to some painful surgeries, which makes the life even more difficult for them and their families.
What do you think? Should parents be allowed to terminate the life of the fetus, knowing that the baby will be born with Down’s syndrome? And if you were in the same situation, would you do that?
Discussion of the week- Introduction
As an attempt to make this blog, a bit more active and reciprocal, I planed to add another segment called “Discussion of the week”. In this section, you are welcome to comment on a rather controversial topic, introduced by me, every Friday night.
For the sake of discussion, more controversial, politically incorrect, stimulating and even devil’s advocate-type of ideas will be immensely appreciated.
Also to make it possible for the readers to follow the discussions, I’d appreciate that even if you don’t want to put your real name there, make a fake ID and use it constantly but please do not leave comments under the title of Anonymous!
P.S. Since all the ideas and comments will be published uncensored, I will accept absolutely no responsibility over their contents whatsoever.
For the sake of discussion, more controversial, politically incorrect, stimulating and even devil’s advocate-type of ideas will be immensely appreciated.
Also to make it possible for the readers to follow the discussions, I’d appreciate that even if you don’t want to put your real name there, make a fake ID and use it constantly but please do not leave comments under the title of Anonymous!
P.S. Since all the ideas and comments will be published uncensored, I will accept absolutely no responsibility over their contents whatsoever.
Check out Iran’s national team super cool football gear in Pendar’s super cool website. A brilliant and talented friend of mine that I absolutely can not figure out, why the hell is studying engineering?!
Thursday, June 01, 2006
Lonesome George
If someday, you find yourself in island of Pinta in the Galapagos and you come across a giant tortoise, you can confidently call him George!
How come? Well, sadly, he’s the last remaining of a species, once wandering around in the island in huge numbers. This 88 years old turtle is condemn living his long life in total loneliness and his death will put an end, not only to his life, but to a million-years- reach history of his race.
Where the ever-increasing catastrophic story of extinction is being retold every minute on this planet, the rather long life of this adorable creature, will keep us, humans, ashamed for years to come. A burning candle, symbolic of a planet in decay, a constant reminder of the earth, becoming more and more a Dorian Gray-ish! picture of our nice looking civilization!
We’re sorry Lonesome George, This planet was yours too and We will miss you.
How come? Well, sadly, he’s the last remaining of a species, once wandering around in the island in huge numbers. This 88 years old turtle is condemn living his long life in total loneliness and his death will put an end, not only to his life, but to a million-years- reach history of his race.
Where the ever-increasing catastrophic story of extinction is being retold every minute on this planet, the rather long life of this adorable creature, will keep us, humans, ashamed for years to come. A burning candle, symbolic of a planet in decay, a constant reminder of the earth, becoming more and more a Dorian Gray-ish! picture of our nice looking civilization!
We’re sorry Lonesome George, This planet was yours too and We will miss you.
Notice
From this week, every Saturday, you will find a small weekly article called “My favorite 101” in which, I’ll list my favorite music titles. Naturally since it will be purely based on my taste, I don’t expect that you’d like every title but you can try a couple of them to see if our tastes match. If they do, you can check it out regularly every week, for 101 weeks.
Also every Sunday, you can find a concise review about a recent movie, preferably still in theatres, called “movie of the week”, as I said before. Although occasionally, I will write about some new releases on DVD too and “Montreal report” will be published every Monday night, from this week on.
That was me, so what’s up with you?!
Also every Sunday, you can find a concise review about a recent movie, preferably still in theatres, called “movie of the week”, as I said before. Although occasionally, I will write about some new releases on DVD too and “Montreal report” will be published every Monday night, from this week on.
That was me, so what’s up with you?!
Wednesday, May 31, 2006
Revelations of the last remaining brain cell
It’ ironic. Those bastards who call themselves Pro-life, and trying their ass off to protect fetuses or brain-dead people in comma are the same people who’re pro dead-penalty and pro war and don’t give a shit about the environment!
It seems that to them, life is valuable only as long as the brain is not working anymore or it hasn’t been developed yet. Otherwise, they don’t give a fuck!
I don’t get religious people…I really don’t
It seems that to them, life is valuable only as long as the brain is not working anymore or it hasn’t been developed yet. Otherwise, they don’t give a fuck!
I don’t get religious people…I really don’t
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Please stop sending the message!
For god’s sake, no one is going to delete your Orkut account. It’s just a trick to measure the naivety of people! Believe me, your Orkut account is safe the same way that sending away stupid texts won’t help your wishes to come to true!
Please guys...enough!
Please guys...enough!
Monday, May 29, 2006
Welcome to the modern dark age
It’s not cynical nor exaggerated, but unfortunately the harsh reality of our society. We live in an era that the political correctness and the virtue of not offending anybody whatsoever, are pushing the limits to a level in which one can hardly suggest a topic, let alone speaking about it, without offending a social group and be labeled as male-chauvinist, racist, anti-Semite or even fascist. To a point that the only creature on this planet that can be safely criticized or making fun of, is a typical “white straight male”!
There’s no doubt about the fact that worthy achievements obtained by the feminism, anti-racism, anti-Semitism or all other humanistic movements, founded to bring justice to those discriminated against, should be guarded but do we have to go so far to suppress any controversial idea, that might opens up a whole new set of thinking but is somehow offensive to someone?! Isn’t it a new form of fascism to oblige people to a brutal self-censorship and label them if they think otherwise or moreover put them on trials just for expressing their rather anti-conformist views?!
What’s becoming of us? Freedom of speech, remember that?!
I can hardly name anybody who has more appreciation for women than I have, but I just want to throw up when I see Lawrence Summer, the president of Harvard university is being forced to resign, because he suggested that the difference in performance in math and science between male and female students might be due to their biological differences in their brain structure!
If an academician can not express an idea, however stupid, backward or controversial the idea might sound, in an academic environment, who can express it and where?
Now, don’t get me wrong. If someone in charge wants to use an unproven theory in order to discriminate against anyone of a particular race, gender or sexual orientation, I would be the first to scream against it, but shouldn’t people be allowed to suggest something, at least as a subject of discussion or scientific investigation? If an idea is not controversial, moving or shocking what is it good for?!
Considering the fact that, most of the values we cherished nowadays as undeniable rights of human beings, like the gender and race equality, someday not very long ago, were considered offensive or even blasphemous and those who dared to bring up those questions were forced to pay huge consequences which sometimes, like the case of Giordano Bruno , was as costly as being burned at the stake. So what makes us think that we have reached to the end of world, that everything we know is complete, unquestionable and undeniable and nobody has the right to even pose a new question anymore?
As much as I respect Jewish people and their culture, and as much as I genuinely believe that the Holocaust is a horrendous historical fact, I can not digest that in a modern European country, they actually put someone in jail, only because he has expressed his ideas or published his research, denying a historical fact! I really think that David Irving is wrong and there’re serious doubts about his references, but what happened to our old method of sitting down and talk about stuff? What happened to the tradition of presenting counter argument against a false or weak analogy? What about writing a critic about a book, a research paper or a movie instead of shouting and screaming and labeling? Since when we decided, discussion and reasoning are obsolete and we should return to the good old fashioned inquisition?
The circle of unspeakable is getting tighter by the days. They’re feminists in France, who’re fighting for introducing the word “La professeur” to the vocabulary (the word professor in French is only used as a masculine form, even for women.), or removing the word “Mademoiselle” from the vocabulary, cause they believe it‘s offensive and it degrades women. Give me a break! You know what degrades women?! A huge number of women around the world are illiterate or semi-literate! In twenty first century, they are still markets in which they sell women for prostitutions. In Africa, women are still in large numbers, being circumcised, sold to old men, being forced to sleep with men who’re HIV positive. Every 26 seconds, one woman is raped in South Africa and the rest of the continent doesn’t have a better record. Systematic rape is being used against women as a military tactic, the legal age of marriage in Muslim worlds is only nine years old and I can go forever! These are degrading, if you’re really serious!
Otherwise, I think calling a young beautiful women, Mademoiselle is charming, and a successful female professor at Princeton, wouldn’t mind if she’s being called Le professeur or La professeur!
Personally, I don’t see any difference between those activists who’re trying to suppress any idea they don’t appreciate and those who burned embassies because of a cartoon or are rioting in the streets, as we speak, because of a simple “NA MA NA!”. They are all backwards, extremist and fanatics and their only difference is their agenda. That’s all!
Dear folks, talking about differences between blacks and whites, men and women, straits and gays, Muslims and Jews, is not racism, sexism or chauvinism, acting in a way that deprives people from achieving their goals and their social rights, is. Believing that a group of people are naturally unable to get to certain points or surpass certain limits just because of their gender, race or sexual orientation, is.
The question is accepting or denying the necessity of the red lines. Once the red lines are successfully established, just by playing with them, those in power, or those with good lobbies, can easily suffocate thinkers, as well as brand new ideas, purely based on personal taste or benefits. That’s unfortunately what’s happening in our world.
By the way, if extreme-feminists are looking for a subject to fight for, I have a good one. Why the men’s and women’s chess competitions hold separately?!
There’s no doubt about the fact that worthy achievements obtained by the feminism, anti-racism, anti-Semitism or all other humanistic movements, founded to bring justice to those discriminated against, should be guarded but do we have to go so far to suppress any controversial idea, that might opens up a whole new set of thinking but is somehow offensive to someone?! Isn’t it a new form of fascism to oblige people to a brutal self-censorship and label them if they think otherwise or moreover put them on trials just for expressing their rather anti-conformist views?!
What’s becoming of us? Freedom of speech, remember that?!
I can hardly name anybody who has more appreciation for women than I have, but I just want to throw up when I see Lawrence Summer, the president of Harvard university is being forced to resign, because he suggested that the difference in performance in math and science between male and female students might be due to their biological differences in their brain structure!
If an academician can not express an idea, however stupid, backward or controversial the idea might sound, in an academic environment, who can express it and where?
Now, don’t get me wrong. If someone in charge wants to use an unproven theory in order to discriminate against anyone of a particular race, gender or sexual orientation, I would be the first to scream against it, but shouldn’t people be allowed to suggest something, at least as a subject of discussion or scientific investigation? If an idea is not controversial, moving or shocking what is it good for?!
Considering the fact that, most of the values we cherished nowadays as undeniable rights of human beings, like the gender and race equality, someday not very long ago, were considered offensive or even blasphemous and those who dared to bring up those questions were forced to pay huge consequences which sometimes, like the case of Giordano Bruno , was as costly as being burned at the stake. So what makes us think that we have reached to the end of world, that everything we know is complete, unquestionable and undeniable and nobody has the right to even pose a new question anymore?
As much as I respect Jewish people and their culture, and as much as I genuinely believe that the Holocaust is a horrendous historical fact, I can not digest that in a modern European country, they actually put someone in jail, only because he has expressed his ideas or published his research, denying a historical fact! I really think that David Irving is wrong and there’re serious doubts about his references, but what happened to our old method of sitting down and talk about stuff? What happened to the tradition of presenting counter argument against a false or weak analogy? What about writing a critic about a book, a research paper or a movie instead of shouting and screaming and labeling? Since when we decided, discussion and reasoning are obsolete and we should return to the good old fashioned inquisition?
The circle of unspeakable is getting tighter by the days. They’re feminists in France, who’re fighting for introducing the word “La professeur” to the vocabulary (the word professor in French is only used as a masculine form, even for women.), or removing the word “Mademoiselle” from the vocabulary, cause they believe it‘s offensive and it degrades women. Give me a break! You know what degrades women?! A huge number of women around the world are illiterate or semi-literate! In twenty first century, they are still markets in which they sell women for prostitutions. In Africa, women are still in large numbers, being circumcised, sold to old men, being forced to sleep with men who’re HIV positive. Every 26 seconds, one woman is raped in South Africa and the rest of the continent doesn’t have a better record. Systematic rape is being used against women as a military tactic, the legal age of marriage in Muslim worlds is only nine years old and I can go forever! These are degrading, if you’re really serious!
Otherwise, I think calling a young beautiful women, Mademoiselle is charming, and a successful female professor at Princeton, wouldn’t mind if she’s being called Le professeur or La professeur!
Personally, I don’t see any difference between those activists who’re trying to suppress any idea they don’t appreciate and those who burned embassies because of a cartoon or are rioting in the streets, as we speak, because of a simple “NA MA NA!”. They are all backwards, extremist and fanatics and their only difference is their agenda. That’s all!
Dear folks, talking about differences between blacks and whites, men and women, straits and gays, Muslims and Jews, is not racism, sexism or chauvinism, acting in a way that deprives people from achieving their goals and their social rights, is. Believing that a group of people are naturally unable to get to certain points or surpass certain limits just because of their gender, race or sexual orientation, is.
The question is accepting or denying the necessity of the red lines. Once the red lines are successfully established, just by playing with them, those in power, or those with good lobbies, can easily suffocate thinkers, as well as brand new ideas, purely based on personal taste or benefits. That’s unfortunately what’s happening in our world.
By the way, if extreme-feminists are looking for a subject to fight for, I have a good one. Why the men’s and women’s chess competitions hold separately?!
One cocktail a day, keeps doctors away!
According to a recent research, published in British medical journal, men who are drinking alcohol everyday are less likely to develop heart disease than those who don’t.
According to this research, steady consumption of alcohol, will reduce the risk of heart disease by 40%.
To see the face of those who try their ass off to justify every religious rules, from fasting and circumcision to not eating pork, with medical facts, is priceless! :)
Cheers!
According to this research, steady consumption of alcohol, will reduce the risk of heart disease by 40%.
To see the face of those who try their ass off to justify every religious rules, from fasting and circumcision to not eating pork, with medical facts, is priceless! :)
Cheers!
Shomaal!
Today was hot, humid and beautiful. As I was doing my after-lunch-daily-promenade in the flower market, I had these weird feeling that I’m in “Shomal”, somewhere near “Khaane Daryaa” perhaps. I think the effect of biological clock was also worthy of mentioning. After all, years ago at this time, the exams were finished and we were ready to go there!
Dear Shomal! I’ve missed you so much.
Dear Shomal! I’ve missed you so much.
Sunday, May 28, 2006
This colleague of mine, who gave me and Sanam ride to Toronto, is a strange man. He drives aggressively and swears almost everybody in the road, yet very thoughtfully criticizes himself for being too aggressive and it goes on for the whole five hours from Montréal to Toronto and vice versa.
Once, when he was swearing the driver in front, for being too slow (and she was driving with the speed of almost 120 km/h!), he laughed at himself and said:
“Have you noticed that when you are in the road, those who’re driving slower than you are coward and stupid and those who’re driving faster, Maniacs? It seems that you are the only person who’s driving with the appropriate speed!
Once, when he was swearing the driver in front, for being too slow (and she was driving with the speed of almost 120 km/h!), he laughed at himself and said:
“Have you noticed that when you are in the road, those who’re driving slower than you are coward and stupid and those who’re driving faster, Maniacs? It seems that you are the only person who’s driving with the appropriate speed!
Bill Maher’s New rule
George Bush has to stop laughing at himself.
When your incompetence literally costs lives, giggling at it isn’t cute or funny.
When your incompetence literally costs lives, giggling at it isn’t cute or funny.
Revelations of the last remaining brain cell
Ladies,
We, men, have two organs in our body that consume hell a lot of blood. Our brain and our …well, you know. Unfortunately, there's always enough blood to run one at the time.
So, as long as we’re talking about eating and having fun and sex and how beautiful you are and stuff like that, you can consider the relationship as OK, but the moment we become philosophers, it simply means, we have all the blood we need in our brains, AKA, THERE’S ABSOLUTELY NO BLOOD THERE!
So next time you hear “I’m at the point in my life where…”, “ I think I need more time to get to know my self…”, “ I have to focus on my career…”, “I'm looking for a more profound perception of life”, or craps like that, you have only two options,
either to accept that it’s over and move on, or keep on fooling yourself.
Either way, good luck!
We, men, have two organs in our body that consume hell a lot of blood. Our brain and our …well, you know. Unfortunately, there's always enough blood to run one at the time.
So, as long as we’re talking about eating and having fun and sex and how beautiful you are and stuff like that, you can consider the relationship as OK, but the moment we become philosophers, it simply means, we have all the blood we need in our brains, AKA, THERE’S ABSOLUTELY NO BLOOD THERE!
So next time you hear “I’m at the point in my life where…”, “ I think I need more time to get to know my self…”, “ I have to focus on my career…”, “I'm looking for a more profound perception of life”, or craps like that, you have only two options,
either to accept that it’s over and move on, or keep on fooling yourself.
Either way, good luck!
Saturday, May 27, 2006
As stupid as American Dreams!
From the trailer, one could imagine, it’s either a smart, sarcastic comedy or simply flushing your valuable time down the drain! Guess what? It’s absolutely the second one!
A senseless, clueless stupid comedy that pathetically tries to be cute, political and socially critical, but in fact, it’s none of them.
The story is about a British man (played by Hugh Grant) who has a hit TV show called “American Dreamz” which is supposed to be a metaphor of Simon Cowell and his American Idol, but like other metaphors in the movie, it’s so closed to the reality that one wonders why the writer is not using the actual names and makes a documentary instead!
The Simon-like character, in attempt to attract even more audience, handpicks three rather bizarre character, a Jewish Hasidic, an Arab who’s living with his family in Orange county ( and has been put there by a terrorist organization) and a blond trash girl (played by Mandy Moore ). From the other side, the recently re-elected president of the united stated, a retarded character whom is constantly being manipulated by his vice-president ( Willem Dafoe ), accidentally has been attracted to the newspapers and is finding out that he has been deceived all the way, so he grounded himself in his office, reading newspapers. In response to public anxiety caused by the absence of the president from the public scene, vice-president talks Hugh Grant into putting the president in the panel of judges for the final round of the American Dreamz. Knowing that, terrorists try to convince and push the Arab guy, Omar, to reach to the final round so he can blow himself up and kill the president. That’s the story. Now details,
Hugh Grant is playing, as usual, one of the only two characters that he basically is able to play, either a handsome well dressed eloquent British naively-nice guy or a handsome well dressed eloquent British asshole! And this time, he’s doing the second one and honestly he’s good, but is it any wonder? He’s playing almost himself and he’s doing OK. Way to go!
The Iraqi guy, Omar (played by Sam Golzari), has a cousin who lives with his family in Orange County and they are clearly Iranian, although it wasn’t mentioned anywhere! I do not expect the writer and director of this movie, Paul Weitz , to know that, but couldn’t Shohre Aghdashlou (Nazanin) tell them that Dudes, Middle east is a region and not a country and not everybody in this region is somehow related to each other?!
And the the president's assassination plan, give me a break! You couldn’t possibly kill Miss piggy in The Muppet show with this plan! To chew plastic bombs like chewing gum and take them inside the theatre?! Are you kidding me?! Dear Paul, when you use metaphors so idiotically close to the reality, at least devise a plan which is closer to what’s happening around the world. Last time, the terrorists you are talking about, hijacked four passenger planes, destroyed twin towers and part of the Pentagon! Planning wise, Believe me, they need more credit!
and making fun of “American Idols”? Really? Isn’t it funny enough for anyone with the IQ level of, well, somewhere between carpet and door knob!? and does it have any benefit, explaining it to those who are clearly below that range?!
And finally, the political jokes in this movie are so superficial that they’re exactly like calling the fattest kid in the school, lardo! Seriously, how smart is that?!
Well, the only interesting point in the movie could be the fact that the naïve guy, Mandy Moore’s boyfriend and later a war veteran, is frequently being abused as a puppet! Not a bad idea but after the magnificent Jarhead , can anybody give any credit to this movie for portraying the same thing but in the most stupid way possible?!
Final word, the movie is absolutely rubbish and a huge waste of time to a point that even if you happen to encounter it while you're flying over seas, don’t even bother yourself, asking for a headphone. American Dreamz with a Z, is as bland and stupid as it can be, ironically, very similar to the actual one, with a S!
I’d seen another version of this, but the character was a naked woman and to be honest, unless you had necrophilia, it was not pleasant! This one though, is downright fun!
Friday, May 26, 2006
Museum of BAD art!
The world's only museum dedicated to the collection, preservation, exhibition and celebration of bad art in all its forms.
The plague of the pop culture!
Funny, hilarious Jon Stewart, remember him?
I remember how happy I got when he deservedly received the Emmy award for the second time in a row and became the host of the Academy awards. Well, maybe I shouldn’t have, if I’d known the popularity will reduce him from a bright intellectual with an exceptional sense of humor to a mediocre joker who does anything to keep the now-a- much-wider audience happy.
What happened to those deep, sarcastic, layered jokes and harsh critics and politically incorrect (sorry Bill!) comments?
For god’s sake! to become understandable for the main stream, I suppose, he’s even simplified the vocabulary he uses, compare to a year ago or so.
This Jon Stewart is way too different than the guy who kicked Tucker Carlson’s ass in that famous Crossfire’s episode. This Jon is shallow, ball less and much too politically correct, with the humor that is more suitable for Shaggy dog, than Daily show.
Now, with Woody Allen has quit being Woody Allen and preferred to become a second hand version of Hitchcock/Dostoyevsky, and with Bill Maher has taken his vacation till the end of August, does anybody know any comedian who has anything more to say than cheap sexual or gay jokes, making fun of blonds and nagging about women?!
I missed the old Jon Stewart!
I remember how happy I got when he deservedly received the Emmy award for the second time in a row and became the host of the Academy awards. Well, maybe I shouldn’t have, if I’d known the popularity will reduce him from a bright intellectual with an exceptional sense of humor to a mediocre joker who does anything to keep the now-a- much-wider audience happy.
What happened to those deep, sarcastic, layered jokes and harsh critics and politically incorrect (sorry Bill!) comments?
For god’s sake! to become understandable for the main stream, I suppose, he’s even simplified the vocabulary he uses, compare to a year ago or so.
This Jon Stewart is way too different than the guy who kicked Tucker Carlson’s ass in that famous Crossfire’s episode. This Jon is shallow, ball less and much too politically correct, with the humor that is more suitable for Shaggy dog, than Daily show.
Now, with Woody Allen has quit being Woody Allen and preferred to become a second hand version of Hitchcock/Dostoyevsky, and with Bill Maher has taken his vacation till the end of August, does anybody know any comedian who has anything more to say than cheap sexual or gay jokes, making fun of blonds and nagging about women?!
I missed the old Jon Stewart!
Just a reminder
Dear folks,
First, as you may have noticed so far, despite my dead-busy schedule, I’ve tried my best to update both my weblog and photoblog everyday (ironically, the one who convinced me to do so, updating hers, hardly once in a month!). to fulfill this dedication to myself, sometimes I have to go through some inhumane conditions such as writing during lunch time or late at night so in spite of my efforts not to have any typo, it’s quite natural that it happens and I’d cordially appreciate if you inform me in case you noticed any.
Second, I write about a variety of subjects from politics and history to art and science, but somehow I can’t figure out why the article about ass-washing got so much attention?!
I just wanted to mention that in a diverse society like the one in Canada, how some minor, insignificant details such as wiping or washing one’s ass, could be qualified as a cultural barrier but it turned out to be not quite trivial. Apparently for some, it’s more important than seal hunting and global warming! so, with a deep remorse, I’m afraid to conclude:
“To wash or not to wash, that’s the question!”
First, as you may have noticed so far, despite my dead-busy schedule, I’ve tried my best to update both my weblog and photoblog everyday (ironically, the one who convinced me to do so, updating hers, hardly once in a month!). to fulfill this dedication to myself, sometimes I have to go through some inhumane conditions such as writing during lunch time or late at night so in spite of my efforts not to have any typo, it’s quite natural that it happens and I’d cordially appreciate if you inform me in case you noticed any.
Second, I write about a variety of subjects from politics and history to art and science, but somehow I can’t figure out why the article about ass-washing got so much attention?!
I just wanted to mention that in a diverse society like the one in Canada, how some minor, insignificant details such as wiping or washing one’s ass, could be qualified as a cultural barrier but it turned out to be not quite trivial. Apparently for some, it’s more important than seal hunting and global warming! so, with a deep remorse, I’m afraid to conclude:
“To wash or not to wash, that’s the question!”
Wednesday, May 24, 2006
Bill Maher’s New rules
If turning on my cell phone can bring down your commercial airliner, build a better plane! I mean…the number of people who carry hand held electronic devices these days equals the number of people who have hands…to give them all veto power over whether passengers live or die, seems like a flaw in the system.
Montreal kicks ass!
As I speak to my friends who live in Toronto (not all of them for sure, but a considerably good portion of them), they have this vision of Montréal as if it’s an exotic city in the middle of Africa, surrounded by volcanoes! Cause every time I ask them to come for a visit, they respond with enthusiasm “ yeah, I’ve been there once and I’m really looking forward to visit again at the end of the summer or next year…”
So I thought it would be useful if I explain some apparently obvious facts about our city, Montreal.
Dear friends,
Don’t let the notion of “French Canada” fools you, it’s still, although rather reluctantly, Canada! meaning that you shouldn’t apply for a visa or something, and you can still use your Canadian money here, as well!
Sure we’re more fun and less workaholic, our girls are way too gorgeous, sexy, tasteful and open minded, in a very good sense!, our city is more beautiful and our roads are too crappy! but if you ignore the fact that you have to call “Shopper’s Drugmart”, “Pharmaprix”, and remember that “PFK” and “KFC” are “La Même Chose”, or you should by your alcohol from “SAQ” and not “LCBO”, it’s almost the same thing.
So, remember, you shouldn’t reserve tickets or plan a year ahead, it’s only five hours of driving away and will cost you about 80$ but you can bet your life that it worths every penny.
Just so you know!
P.S. We don’t have hot dog vendors in the streets but instead you can buy alcohols from grocery stores. I think it’s a fair trade off!
So I thought it would be useful if I explain some apparently obvious facts about our city, Montreal.
Dear friends,
Don’t let the notion of “French Canada” fools you, it’s still, although rather reluctantly, Canada! meaning that you shouldn’t apply for a visa or something, and you can still use your Canadian money here, as well!
Sure we’re more fun and less workaholic, our girls are way too gorgeous, sexy, tasteful and open minded, in a very good sense!, our city is more beautiful and our roads are too crappy! but if you ignore the fact that you have to call “Shopper’s Drugmart”, “Pharmaprix”, and remember that “PFK” and “KFC” are “La Même Chose”, or you should by your alcohol from “SAQ” and not “LCBO”, it’s almost the same thing.
So, remember, you shouldn’t reserve tickets or plan a year ahead, it’s only five hours of driving away and will cost you about 80$ but you can bet your life that it worths every penny.
Just so you know!
P.S. We don’t have hot dog vendors in the streets but instead you can buy alcohols from grocery stores. I think it’s a fair trade off!
Over the Hedge
About a year ago, I think it was before Shrek 2, I saw a quite intriguing coming-soon-trailer about an animated cartoon called Suburbia. Characters, dialogues and techniques were promising an interesting movie. I didn’t hear about the movie since last night that I watched it with the new title of “Over the hedge”.
The movie is downright brilliant. Unlike “Ice age 2”, it has a well-written and thoughtful storyline (apparently from a comic strip). Characters are cute and adorable, animation is just right, not pretentious at all, and it completely serves the storyline, and most of all, the scenario is witty, I mean while it’s extremely funny, it has a dark, satirical tone to it, makes fun of the unleashed culture of consumption, shows our brutal intrusion into natural habitats and our inability to coexist as a part of the ecosystem. The fact that this Monday, when I was coming back from Toronto, was screaming itself to me by the numerous carcasses of raccoons and other animals, killed by the passing cars while they were trying desperately to get themselves to the other part of their split-by-the-highway’s habitat. And unlike my lecture, it all has been done in an artistically subtle way which was not annoying or boring whatsoever .
To me, the best character of the film was the fat lazy Persian cat who speaks with a hilarious Persian accent, done by Omid Djalili (the only international Iranian stand up comedian that I know) and it’s so funny that I was crying in the theatre!
I strongly recommend this movie and I guarantee that you will like it, adore it and will laugh your ass off! Enjoy
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
TO again!
I’m back again from TO and I don’t think that I go again anytime soon. Although it’s fun, I meet some new people every time and that’s additional to cool unexpected stuff that always happens in TO (at least for me), but too many drinks, too much smokes, too little sleep and 10 hours of driving is not something that I can take, every other week.
Now, interesting stuff from this trip:
1. A cool Woody Allen T-shirt that Naz made for me.
2. Maryam’s super healthy, somewhat bizarre but quite delicious cuisine.
3. Drinking and singing in a Karaoke bar.
4. Kaveh and Takin’s passionate discussion about some bird’s eggs! till 6 o’clock in the morning! fallowed by a more absurd experiment.
5. being introduced to some brilliant music at Golnaz’s place
6. Dizi and Ghalyoon in Patogh which was heavenly.
7. Having brunch at Rosedale with this lovely couple, Sam and Talayeh, followed by coffee at Doria, served by a cute Portuguese waitress with the sexiest voice ever!
8. Severe lack of sleep for about 10 to 15 hours.
So long TO, at least for couple of weeks.
Now, interesting stuff from this trip:
1. A cool Woody Allen T-shirt that Naz made for me.
2. Maryam’s super healthy, somewhat bizarre but quite delicious cuisine.
3. Drinking and singing in a Karaoke bar.
4. Kaveh and Takin’s passionate discussion about some bird’s eggs! till 6 o’clock in the morning! fallowed by a more absurd experiment.
5. being introduced to some brilliant music at Golnaz’s place
6. Dizi and Ghalyoon in Patogh which was heavenly.
7. Having brunch at Rosedale with this lovely couple, Sam and Talayeh, followed by coffee at Doria, served by a cute Portuguese waitress with the sexiest voice ever!
8. Severe lack of sleep for about 10 to 15 hours.
So long TO, at least for couple of weeks.
Saturday, May 20, 2006
Proud ass-washer’s nation!
The first and the foremost concern of every Iranian girl that I’ve seen who was supposed to go out with a non-Iranian man for the first time, and far ahead of all those cultural differences and language barriers, simply was the fact that they don’t wash their asses!
I suppose the opposite concern holds at the other side of the table, since almost every non-Iranian girl who’s come to my apartment for the first time, wanted to know what the hell the sprinkler is doing in my bathroom!
Our argument is that their asses wouldn’t be clean enough without being washed thoroughly by water and theirs, well, they prefer to leave their asses crappy but their hands clean.
Anyway, the fact that they start to wash or we start to quit is one important indicator of who’s the boss in the relationship!
But how clean is clean enough? According to one of my friends, after you washed, you should be able to hear the squeaking sound when you rub your finger on it! What’s your criterion?
I suppose the opposite concern holds at the other side of the table, since almost every non-Iranian girl who’s come to my apartment for the first time, wanted to know what the hell the sprinkler is doing in my bathroom!
Our argument is that their asses wouldn’t be clean enough without being washed thoroughly by water and theirs, well, they prefer to leave their asses crappy but their hands clean.
Anyway, the fact that they start to wash or we start to quit is one important indicator of who’s the boss in the relationship!
But how clean is clean enough? According to one of my friends, after you washed, you should be able to hear the squeaking sound when you rub your finger on it! What’s your criterion?
Just a reminder
Dear people,
It’s 21st century. Era of blue tooth and wireless internet and almost every retarded living human being between the age of 6 and 86, knows what the hell the answering machine is!
If you don’t answer the phone, we surly can assume you are either not at home or not able to answer the phone (or you simply don’t want to) and you really don’t have to explain in detail what should we do after the beep in 4 different languages especially since the lady inside your machine is going to explain the same procedure again, right after you finished with yours.
Thank you
It’s 21st century. Era of blue tooth and wireless internet and almost every retarded living human being between the age of 6 and 86, knows what the hell the answering machine is!
If you don’t answer the phone, we surly can assume you are either not at home or not able to answer the phone (or you simply don’t want to) and you really don’t have to explain in detail what should we do after the beep in 4 different languages especially since the lady inside your machine is going to explain the same procedure again, right after you finished with yours.
Thank you
Revelations of the very last remaining brain cell, as promised
When a woman responds “Great” to an ordinary “How are doing” question for a couple of days in a row, there’s either a romantic affair or a sexual adventure involved. Girls can not feel great in a whole seven days of a week, if they’re not in love or getting laid!
For guys, it could be simply due their favorite soccer team being in a good shape, or two consecutive strait-flush in a row, in last night’s poker
For guys, it could be simply due their favorite soccer team being in a good shape, or two consecutive strait-flush in a row, in last night’s poker
Let’s be unpatriotic for a change!
I’m sick and tired of hearing about our troops in Afghanistan and their bravery and all those sacrifices they make on a daily bases!
Why the hell anyone anywhere wants to talk about anything in public involving our troops, should begin the sentence with raving about their selflessness?!
Dear folks, we’re not talking about “medecins sans frontiers”, we are talking about soldiers. They are soldiers and soldiers do not make sacrifice! In the best case scenario, they do their jobs! They are not men and women performing a compulsory military service, even if that was the case still couldn’t be qualified as sacrifice, they have been employed by the government to fight like any other employee doing any other job. Of course theirs is more dangerous than most of the jobs, but that’s simply their job description! They’re getting paid to work in dangerous situation. That’s why they carry a gun. That’s why they dress like bushes and trees and they don’t do it for the sake of humanity, they do that in exchange of money.
So please stop saying “They’re fighting for Canada”, cause the most perilous threats all around Canada are thunder storm and polar bears! and Global warming of course!
And enough with “They are helping people in Afghanistan”, cause soldiers do not decide where to go and what to do! That’s the definition of a good soldier. They’re helping people in Afghanistan, simply because they’ve been ordered to do so, exactly the same way they’re protecting a government of coup against a democratically elected president in Haiti!
If someone registered for army in the time of peace, either the person is naively dreaming about playing War-game!, for which to see a real battle field would be a suitable therapy, or he likes an adventurous and well-paid job or easily he hasn’t got any other options but to be a soldier and in either case, I can not admire him more than I admire any another person, performing any other service to society.
You know who I do admire? Those who leave their well-paid jobs to work for “Doctors or engineers without borders”, those who go to poor countries to fight against human trafficking, AIDS, Malaria, women being raped and children being abused. Those who tie themselves to trees, hinder the Whale hunting ships, trying their ass off to save the planet that does not only belong to us humans! That’s what I call sacrifice. Soldiers…not really!
Why the hell anyone anywhere wants to talk about anything in public involving our troops, should begin the sentence with raving about their selflessness?!
Dear folks, we’re not talking about “medecins sans frontiers”, we are talking about soldiers. They are soldiers and soldiers do not make sacrifice! In the best case scenario, they do their jobs! They are not men and women performing a compulsory military service, even if that was the case still couldn’t be qualified as sacrifice, they have been employed by the government to fight like any other employee doing any other job. Of course theirs is more dangerous than most of the jobs, but that’s simply their job description! They’re getting paid to work in dangerous situation. That’s why they carry a gun. That’s why they dress like bushes and trees and they don’t do it for the sake of humanity, they do that in exchange of money.
So please stop saying “They’re fighting for Canada”, cause the most perilous threats all around Canada are thunder storm and polar bears! and Global warming of course!
And enough with “They are helping people in Afghanistan”, cause soldiers do not decide where to go and what to do! That’s the definition of a good soldier. They’re helping people in Afghanistan, simply because they’ve been ordered to do so, exactly the same way they’re protecting a government of coup against a democratically elected president in Haiti!
If someone registered for army in the time of peace, either the person is naively dreaming about playing War-game!, for which to see a real battle field would be a suitable therapy, or he likes an adventurous and well-paid job or easily he hasn’t got any other options but to be a soldier and in either case, I can not admire him more than I admire any another person, performing any other service to society.
You know who I do admire? Those who leave their well-paid jobs to work for “Doctors or engineers without borders”, those who go to poor countries to fight against human trafficking, AIDS, Malaria, women being raped and children being abused. Those who tie themselves to trees, hinder the Whale hunting ships, trying their ass off to save the planet that does not only belong to us humans! That’s what I call sacrifice. Soldiers…not really!
Friday, May 19, 2006
Bathroom under new management
From next week, I’m going to make some weekly schedule for this blog. Every week, I will have a “movie of the week” and a “artist of the week” section in which I’ll write about new movies that I’ve seen, or my favorite artists.
“Revelations of the very last remaining brain cell” will be a small weekly article in which I’ll write down a conclusion about something, preferably funny and somehow stupid.
In another weekly section, I will write about interesting places in Montreal including Bars, cafés, restaurants, monuments, cools streets and lovely neighborhoods. Places that are not necessarily touristic but surly worth visiting
All of those will be in addition to regular bathroom stuff like daily links and articles.
And dear friends, whenever you come here and read something, leave some comments please. Short or long, thoughtful or stupid, kind or brutal, just do it! (sorry Nike!). It will help me keep going.
“Revelations of the very last remaining brain cell” will be a small weekly article in which I’ll write down a conclusion about something, preferably funny and somehow stupid.
In another weekly section, I will write about interesting places in Montreal including Bars, cafés, restaurants, monuments, cools streets and lovely neighborhoods. Places that are not necessarily touristic but surly worth visiting
All of those will be in addition to regular bathroom stuff like daily links and articles.
And dear friends, whenever you come here and read something, leave some comments please. Short or long, thoughtful or stupid, kind or brutal, just do it! (sorry Nike!). It will help me keep going.
Wednesday, May 17, 2006
Sorry Foroogh!
Dast-haaiat raa,
chon khaatere ii soozaan,
dar dast-haai e aashegh e man bogzaar...
Baad maa raa baa khod khaahad bord...
Baad maa raa baa khod khaahad bord...
(en shaa allaah!)
Tuesday, May 16, 2006
Bill Maher's New Rules
If you’re playing a sport where most of the speed comes from gravity, you’re not an athlete, you’re a weight!
Get ready TO, I'm comming again!
It’s been three years, well exactly three years and a month, that I’ve been living in Montreal and I never forget the first day and the first glance. I cannot describe how discouraged I got when I saw the city for the first time. I mean, when you hear all those raving about how beautiful “Paris of the North America” is, discouragement is almost guaranteed! I don’t blame anybody. In fact, I should have guessed my self that a city which has been built by some fur merchants and has never had any form of aristocracy, let alone monarchy, can’t be as beautiful as Paris, Vienna or any other European city but one always tends to believe what he likes to believe. Even the first pictures that I took from Montreal were horrendous, reflecting my feeling toward the city. Some rusty air-conditioning fans, on top of an ugly ugly rooftop!
But like not-a-conventional-beautiful girl, who doesn’t catch your eyes at the first sight but the way she moves, talks and behaves will eventually makes you fall in love with her, I got soon hunted by the sexy and somewhat attractive character of this charming lady. An affair, which has been lasted till today.
This weekend, I’m going to Toronto again. She has also managed to change my view somehow drastically in the past visits and something’s telling me that she can do more.
But honestly, with this appearance, she got to have quite a personality :)
But like not-a-conventional-beautiful girl, who doesn’t catch your eyes at the first sight but the way she moves, talks and behaves will eventually makes you fall in love with her, I got soon hunted by the sexy and somewhat attractive character of this charming lady. An affair, which has been lasted till today.
This weekend, I’m going to Toronto again. She has also managed to change my view somehow drastically in the past visits and something’s telling me that she can do more.
But honestly, with this appearance, she got to have quite a personality :)
Stop testing on Animals...what does it really mean?
I like to call them insiders who sabotage every group from within by neutralizing all the efforts of sane and moderate activists, fighting for the same cause but in a much civilized manner. I’m talking about extremists. Those who give the people in charge, the luxury of diverting public’s opinions from the real problem by magnifying the act of bunch of anarchists, stereotyping anybody who talks about the same issue.
And this time, the case is the same old “fighting against testing drugs on animals”. A precious cause and some genuinely valuable efforts that have been tarnished by some who vandalizing properties, beating researchers and black mailing their families.
Just in England, they’ve gone so far that the government now has got enough support to publicly back up pro-testing movement to the point that Tony Blair himself signed a petition, supporting the continuation of the testing, something unheard of so far.
Well, that was exactly what we need. Some people marching in the streets, shouting “performing tests on animals are necessary for human’s sake” as if all those activists are some lunatics who want to save rats and guinea pigs at the cost of people’s lives!
So let’s make some points clear so you don’t think all those against testing are crazy, irrational or idealist. What they say (those with at least 80% of their brain cells still functioning!) simply are,
1. Test on animals should only be performed when it’s absolutely necessary to save lives. So it’s ok if you want to test anti-Cancer or anti-Aids drugs, but it’s not Ok when you torture and kill animals for heart burn medications or much worse, cosmetic products!
2. A huge amount of test being performed on poor animals is downright redundant. (they say 70%. I think it has been exaggerated but even 25% is already too much!). This is not hard to comprehend since anybody who has worked in an office has an idea about how much resources (paper for instance) is being wasted every day and there is no reason we assume the same pattern is not followed in labs! There’s only a small and minor difference and that is, those animals can feel the pain and they can’t be recycled!
3. Testing on animals is not a reliable way of insuring new drugs are safe since even those small genetic differences make some successfully tested drugs on rats, dogs and even monkeys, almost lethal when tested on human beings (they are hundreds of documented examples, all over the world). So it’s rational if one expect drug companies to invest on developing alternative ways and to support those methods that exist, not only to reduce the number of animals being subjected to tests, but also to secure the health of those volunteers in final stages of testing.
In other words, they are alternative ways, not for all procedures but for lots of them and also there are ways to maximize the efficiency of the methods, when performing a test on animals is essential.
The medical and pharmaceutical industry should realize that every life of every animal is precious and if it’s not absolutely necessary to take it, it’s absolutely unnecessary to do so. It may cost a bit more, but it worth it to the last penny! That’s all. Is it so much to ask?
Comment to my self: In fact, in the world that we can’t convince people not to buy fur coats, or SUV’s or at least not to vote for an anti-environmentalist stupid ass like Bush, maybe it is too much to ask. Sometimes I think if the slavery has not been abolished so far, there were certainly no way in this age that anybody could even propose that, considering its devastating effect on businesses and the economical growth and other craps! Think about it!
And this time, the case is the same old “fighting against testing drugs on animals”. A precious cause and some genuinely valuable efforts that have been tarnished by some who vandalizing properties, beating researchers and black mailing their families.
Just in England, they’ve gone so far that the government now has got enough support to publicly back up pro-testing movement to the point that Tony Blair himself signed a petition, supporting the continuation of the testing, something unheard of so far.
Well, that was exactly what we need. Some people marching in the streets, shouting “performing tests on animals are necessary for human’s sake” as if all those activists are some lunatics who want to save rats and guinea pigs at the cost of people’s lives!
So let’s make some points clear so you don’t think all those against testing are crazy, irrational or idealist. What they say (those with at least 80% of their brain cells still functioning!) simply are,
1. Test on animals should only be performed when it’s absolutely necessary to save lives. So it’s ok if you want to test anti-Cancer or anti-Aids drugs, but it’s not Ok when you torture and kill animals for heart burn medications or much worse, cosmetic products!
2. A huge amount of test being performed on poor animals is downright redundant. (they say 70%. I think it has been exaggerated but even 25% is already too much!). This is not hard to comprehend since anybody who has worked in an office has an idea about how much resources (paper for instance) is being wasted every day and there is no reason we assume the same pattern is not followed in labs! There’s only a small and minor difference and that is, those animals can feel the pain and they can’t be recycled!
3. Testing on animals is not a reliable way of insuring new drugs are safe since even those small genetic differences make some successfully tested drugs on rats, dogs and even monkeys, almost lethal when tested on human beings (they are hundreds of documented examples, all over the world). So it’s rational if one expect drug companies to invest on developing alternative ways and to support those methods that exist, not only to reduce the number of animals being subjected to tests, but also to secure the health of those volunteers in final stages of testing.
In other words, they are alternative ways, not for all procedures but for lots of them and also there are ways to maximize the efficiency of the methods, when performing a test on animals is essential.
The medical and pharmaceutical industry should realize that every life of every animal is precious and if it’s not absolutely necessary to take it, it’s absolutely unnecessary to do so. It may cost a bit more, but it worth it to the last penny! That’s all. Is it so much to ask?
Comment to my self: In fact, in the world that we can’t convince people not to buy fur coats, or SUV’s or at least not to vote for an anti-environmentalist stupid ass like Bush, maybe it is too much to ask. Sometimes I think if the slavery has not been abolished so far, there were certainly no way in this age that anybody could even propose that, considering its devastating effect on businesses and the economical growth and other craps! Think about it!
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